Between Doubt And Faith by Scott Nellis

Post With Caution

2012-01-23T16:37:00.003-05:00

I was reading a blog recently by a pastor named Jonathan Martin, http://pastorjonathanmartin.com/. He wrote some very interesting thoughts about social media in relation to ministry (though his thoughts apply to any area of vocation). Here's the excerpt:

Last year, I contributed a chapter to a book for Dr. Raymond F. Culpepper called The Great Commission Connection. I was asked to write about the connection between the great commission and media, with a special emphasis on social media. In it I wrote at length about not only the promise, but the peril of social media, especially with the ability to so quickly speak destructive words within the Body of Christ without safeguards of Biblical accountability. I tried to address this constructively in the broader construct of a theology of online life. To quote myself:
When we have such powerful tools at our disposal, making it possible for us to broadcast our every thought and whim to the world with such ease, the key to using media in our mission may lie as much in our restraint as in our creativity. Within a matter of seconds, I have the capability to share my opinions about any conceivable topic or issue with the world in a matter of seconds. But just because I can, doesn’t mean that I should…
I try to heed my own counsel and be cautious about what issues I do in fact choose to address in this kind of format.

Jonathan's words resonate deeply with me. I, too, have found myself with an aversion to Facebook posts and tweets that hastily communicate things that wouldn't be said face-to-face. I agree with him that it's just too easy to hit "post" and send your thoughts out to the world. In my work, people have left our church over issues that could have been resolved in a face-to-face meeting, but instead a train of emails set off a firestorm of hurt and misinterpreted motives. In fact, I hope to share this topic in future conversations, as blogs can cause the same problems as Facebook posts, emails, and tweets. And I, too, have found myself explaining why I said something in an email and what I meant by it. It's just not worth the confusion and trouble.

To reiterate, Jonathan said, "When we have such powerful tools at our disposal, making it possible for us to broadcast our every thought and whim to the world with such ease, the key to using media in our mission may lie as much in our restraint as in our creativity." In other words, watch what you say. This is truer now than ever. If the subject of an email is of significant importance, then that topic probably deserves a phone call. If you find yourself posting and tweeting about controversial matters, whether it be politics, religion, or even the antics of someone in the news, then pause. Stop for a moment and consider how your post will be received by those on your list of "friends." Will you alienate people? Will you offend people? Is this the type of comment that you would share at dinner with your friends?

I read posts on Facebook all the time that I find very...well, let's say 'enlightening.' Most of these posts are random, spur-of-the-moment thoughts. If these thoughts are simply that you're watching CSI tonight, then you're fine. But—and this is a very big but—if you find yourself posting your thoughts on a hot-button topic, then beware. These are the exact thoughts that will get you in the most trouble. If you're truly impassioned about a cause, then write your senator; don't post it on Facebook or Twitter. You will only ostracize yourself and cause others to question your motives.

The Evolution Of Reading In A Digital World

2012-01-11T13:56:00.013-05:00

So I've been doing a lot of online reading lately, along with my standard two to three books at my bedside. I'm starting to notice the stark differences between the former and latter, and I'm finding myself a little torn. Every time I think of buying a Kindle or Nook and saving myself a lot of bookshelf space, I run across a dilemma that makes me want to regress to the pre-digital days.

My Digital Dilemma
I'll try to explain my dilemma by example. Every time I start to read a great online article or blog, I find my attention seized by another linked article within the text. Does this happen to you? The best recent example I can find is by a blogger and pastor named JR Forasteros. He has a great review of the new, controversial book Real Marriage by Mark and Grace Driscoll. I loved his review and thought it was very insightful. Still, reading the first paragraph of the review was like having my attention thrown in a washing machine. His review exemplifies what I've been doing here, which is what every blogger and news site seems to be doing...embedding links to anything and everything within their article. It's hard enough to carve out time to read in our advertising and media-saturated world. Now it's becoming harder still. I, like many young men, have the attention span of a 5-year-old. This is especially true when it comes to watching TV, walking through the movie section at Target, or looking something up on the Internet. Here's another example: Click over to AOL and try to search for something. Their Web page is filled with so much distracting, albeit amusing, fodder that you'll forget what you ever wanted to search for in the first place. I say all of this because I find it ironic, and a bit frightening, that I can't read an entire article without clicking on at least one or two links within that article before I'm finished. I get back to the first article and think, "What was this about again?"

This is the new norm. This is how Web sites track what your interests are and sell you stuff. This is how Facebook displays ads that interest you and Netflix knows just what movies and shows to recommend to you. Kind of feels like 1984, doesn't it? I'm not necessarily criticizing what bloggers and news sites are doing by embedding links to related topics. I'm just finding myself slowing down to analyze whether this is a good and helpful trend, rather than simply accepting it. As a society, we should continually slow down and analyze whether or not a new trend is useful, helpful, and, most importantly, good for us.

Let's face it...the digital revolution is altering us. It's changing the way we communicate (or the lack thereof), and it's changing the way we absorb information. So enjoy the technology, for sure. Just be sure to stop every now and then and think about what the technology is doing to you.

For My Own Curiosity
Did you make it to the end of this blog without clicking any of the links above? Was it hard to come back to this blog after reading those others?

Christopher Hitchens's Death And The Evangelical Fail

2011-12-18T13:13:00.001-05:00

This past week renowned author and atheist Christopher Hitchens passed away of esophageal cancer. Hitchens is author of the bestselling book, God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything. Christians around the world have used his death as an opportunity to throw a final posthumous punch. Maybe you won't interpret it this way, but let's look at some quotes to be sure. Pastor Rick Warren of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, CA, tweeted, "My friend Christopher Hitchens has died. I loved & prayed for him constantly & grieve his loss. He knows the Truth now." Albert Mohler, president of The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, also went to Twitter to drive his point home. He said Hitchens's death "is an excruciating reminder of the consequences of unbelief. We can only pray others will believe."

Let's be honest. These are not evangelical Christians showing a deep, sincere love for the loss of one of the world's great minds. No, this is simply the abuse of an opportunity. This opportunity allowed them to make an arrogant show of themselves on the world's leading asinine-soapbox, Twitter. This is not love. I'll say it again...this is not love. We're called to love one another, regardless of beliefs. And our love is also to be sincere. So it really frustrates me that so many prominent evangelical leaders used Hitchens's death as an opportunity to score a point for the God team.

If you still don't think that these little tweets are unfair and unloving, consider again Warren's statement: "My friend Christopher Hitchens has died. I loved & prayed for him constantly & grieve his loss. He knows the Truth now." Don't you think he could have left off the "He knows the Truth now" part? Wouldn't that have sounded so much more gracious? When I read these online postings, what I see is this: "You didn't believe in God, you got cancer, and now you're dead. Well, that's what you get for not believing in God." So to all the arrogant evangelicals out there, remember this: The same grace that saves you, regardless of anything you've done (and all the stupid tweets you've posted), is the same grace that comes to Christopher Hitchens. Don't act like you know God's ways...and remember the humble prayer of the tax collector in Luke 18.

In God Is Not Great, Christopher Hitchens says that organized religion is "hostile to free inquiry." These evangelical 'tweeters' are doing an excellent job to affirm Hitchens's statement. We should embrace differing views, rather than argue against them. I think it's easy to read certain passages of the Bible and conclude that we need to oppose those who oppose God. This is one of the main irritants that fuels my love/hate relationship with the Bible. Still, the Bible should never be cherry-picked. Love for those with differing views is the main, undergirding theme of the book. We too often forget that.

Keeping My Mouth Shut On The Internet

2011-10-20T23:07:00.002-04:00

Blame it on a Christian news Web site.

Every morning I open my Firefox browser to its homepage, The Christian Post, where I get a speckling of world and religious news. And every morning, I find myself disappointed in how divisive religion is. There's always a depressing mix of articles, from the typical stories about homosexuality in America, to Harold Camping's doomsday predictions, to billboard battles between atheists and Christians. It's just too much to start my day with. I guess I should just switch to CNN.com as my homepage, but, as a Christian, I really do want to know what religious issues are happening in the world. It's just sad that most of them reflect petty things such as Harold Camping end-of-the-world predictions—and just how many evangelicals actually disapprove of him—rather than highlighting major injustices like poverty and human trafficking.

For me, the issue shifts to, 'Should Christians just stay off the Internet altogether?' Should Christians really use the Internet as their online soapbox?

And to answer your presumed question, yes—I do realize the hypocrisy of using a blog to consider this subject.

On a serious note, I do question my own partiality to writing Web logs. I question my online musings mainly because of the crap I see on The Christian Post. It makes Christianity look like a damn high-school gossip show. "He said this...She believes in that..." I realize that when a person with 'authority' claims a certain idea or doctrine as the gospel truth, it can raise eyebrows and blood pressure. I get that. But that's exactly why I think more Christians should withhold their opinions from the Internet. Just stay off of it. And quit posting religious thoughts on Facebook, too. It's just going to make people write angry comments on your wall. If we're really witnesses to what we believe, then I would hope we'd realize how terrible we look. We will always have our opinions and beliefs, but online articles and status updates are really not the best places to share those thoughts. If you want to see things in this world get better, then write a letter to your senator. Go volunteer. Send some money to organizations that work to prevent whatever it is that's ticking you off. Philip Yancey once stated, "No one converted to Christianity because they lost the argument." A digital conversation will never be as gracious as one that's face-to-face. There may be a place for productive religious discourse on the Internet, but it's hard to find. And I find that I respect those who keep their divisive comments and opinions to a minimum, while I find it hard to respect those who are consistently posting negativity. It seems to me that, while Jesus had strong opinions at times, he mostly kept his mouth closed and showed compassion. There's an idea.

Forming Habits

2011-09-28T14:33:00.001-04:00

As I was typing today I found myself pausing for a moment. I was typing so fast and realized that I don't give any thought to what my fingers are doing or what keys they're landing on. It's as if my fingers are on autopilot. I know my brain is directing them, but it's not until I slow down and give thought to every keystroke that I realize how habitual my typing has become. I really don't even think about it.

We usually think of habits as bad things. Though as I thought about my habitual typing, I wondered how many things in my life might become just as second-nature as typing. If I made exercise, prayer, patience, and similar things a daily habit, would they become automatic, just like typing? It seems that most days I have to muster the energy to cook, clean, exercise, read, balance the checkbook, etc. I guess I'm just wondering how my life might look it I were more dedicated to making certain things a daily habit. I guess I would lose some spontaneity, but I think I'll take good daily habits over spontaneity any day. I'll keep you posted.

Life In The Middle

2011-08-20T21:07:00.009-04:00

I've decided to redesign my blog site a little. I want it to reflect who I am and where I'm at, spiritually speaking. My worldview has gone through some changes since I was in my early 20s, and I guess I'm still learning what I believe.

If one thing's for sure, it's that nothing's for sure.

Such is life when you're in the middle. Right between doubt and faith. Clinging to your beliefs, but some days...just barely.

The funny, ironic twist: I'm employed full time in ministry. Actually, that's probably not all that ironic at all. For me, I've found that the best developer of my own beliefs and worldview is to simply sit back and watch how other people act. Are they religious nutcases? Are they arrogant jerks? Are they narcissistic and self-centered? Are they political ranters who condemn everybody and everything that doesn't agree with them? All of these scenarios have influenced who I am today. I guess it's all made me question what I believe, and—maybe more importantly—how I share those beliefs.

In one of his many great blog entries, Gordon Atkinson wrote, "Understand that this preacher NEVER asks people to become Christians. If anything, I warn people. I consider following Jesus to be a pretty stiff commitment, and I don't ever sugar coat it. If someone is seeking a spiritual path and wants to journey with me, I'm fine with that. I'll shoulder my pack, help get his adjusted, and we'll move on down the road together. I don't really give a sh*t about making converts. That's not my business. I will walk with people though, if they want."1 And so it seems to be with me. I'm not into encouraging 'personal relationships' with Jesus or saving anyone's soul. That's God's work. I'm fine with just admitting I'm a broken mess and only God can fix me. I'll walk beside someone and listen to their doubts, but I probably won't offer any trite answers.

Part of my own doubt arises from the brokenness and the ashes of life. In his book, O Me Of Little Faith, Jason Boyett writes, "For all the happy talk about God's blessing and favor on Christian TV, you don't have to look very far to find a God who seems less available than we'd like. Where is God among the AIDS and war orphans of East Africa? Where is God among the victims of terrorism? Where is God in the early death of a young mom from cancer? Where is God among the glitter of Las Vegas and the frenzy of Times Square? Where is God among the piracy of Somalia or the breadlines of Zimbabwe?"2 Jason Boyett's questions resonate so deeply with me. I turn on the television and stop at a gospel channel. There's a choir, praising God with so much zeal and enthusiasm, and I think to myself, "Sure, it's easy to praise God there in that comfy building with your nice robes. But would you sing those songs in the middle of the rubble and tent towns of Haiti?" I'll admit I'm not quite the activist I should be. There are so many injustices I should stand up against, but prayer seems to be my only weapon of choice. I can say, though, that it truly pains my heart when a child is abused, or a young man or woman dies of cancer, or when someone has to sleep on the street. And I, like so many, quietly wonder where God is in the midst of these injustices.

Still, I hold on. I cling to my faith because I want to believe that good will win out someday and that there really is a God out there who holds every tear that we shed. Faith and doubt. I cannot fully live on either side of these extremes, at least not yet. For every prayer of thankfulness that goes up, another of confusion and bewilderment follows. Contentment can be found in the middle, where doubt and faith meet. A questioning soul is a soul who cares and who deeply feels pain, and a faithful soul can still struggle with doubt.

1 Gordon Atkinson, RealLivePreacher.com (Grand Rapids, Eerdmans, 2004), 128.
2 Jason Boyett, O Me Of Little Faith: True Confessions Of A Spiritual Weakling (Grand Rapids, Zondervan, 2010), 209.

Justice And Mercy In "12 Angry Men"

2011-07-18T12:00:00.049-04:00

And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
Micah 6:8

A Simple Requirement?
During a recent mission trip, I was reminded of this short passage from the book of Micah. It's the famous pronouncement that summarizes God's will for everyone. At first glance, it seems like a pretty simple and clear command. What does God want from you? Act justly. Love mercy. Walk humbly with God.

Still, I found myself a bit stuck on this verse. Justice and mercy are two nouns that are pretty opposite of each other. Seeking justice invokes thoughts of punishment and accountability, of preventing evil. Mercy, on the other hand, invokes thoughts of compassion and forgiveness. How is someone supposed to balance these very different commands in their efforts to do God's will?

Justice And Mercy In 12 Angry Men

I was recently inspired as I watched one of my favorite movies, the classic 1957 film, 12 Angry Men. It's a phenomenal morality tale that pits twelve jurors in a room to decide a verdict in the case of an 18-year-old boy accused of killing his father. The story's protagonist is Juror #8, expertly portrayed by Henry Fonda. He is the lone dissenting voice who attempts to persuade the eleven other jurors to fully examine their evidence before sending the boy to the electric chair. Henry Fonda's Juror #8 is one of the best examples of simultaneously acting justly and loving mercy that I've ever seen. He wants to find out the truth, but realizes that none of the jurors will know for sure who the guilty party is. At the same time, he wants to show compassion to an accused boy who has had a very hard life. He says, "Well, there were eleven votes for guilty. It's not easy to raise my hand and send a boy off to die without talking about it first." This is acting justly and loving mercy. It's seeking to prevent evil from happening again, but upholding mercy as something valuable in every situation.

At first the case seems to be very open and shut. The accused boy has a weak alibi and a knife he claimed to have lost is found at the scene of the murder. But as Juror #8 stands up for the boy, stating that, "I just think we owe him a few words, that's all," other jurors slowly begin to listen and think more deeply about the evidence presented. The idea of "justice" starts to become a serious and thoughtful endeavor, rather than a impulsive opinion.

While all the jurors at first seem to be reasonable men who are fully capable of deciding a verdict for a murder trial, personal prejudices are slowly revealed. While justice may have been the initial goal for each juror, eleven of them didn't bring any concern for mercy to that table. What they did bring to the table was a history. Some have a prejudice against the boy because he is a foreigner. Others simply want to wrap it up and get on to other stuff, outside of that courthouse. Some of them identify with the slum upbringing of the accused boy. Still others start to question the testimony of the two eyewitnesses. And so mercy and justice begin their delicate dance, each taking their proper steps. One by one, the jurors show signs of mercy as they seek a fair and just decision. And the ones who maintain that the boy is guilty—even after examining much questionable evidence—start to show an unmerciful side, one that has the façade of a concern for justice, but is really fueled by anger and hatred.

It's not easy to summarize how to act justly while also showing mercy, but 12 Angry Men is a profound example of how this biblical passage should be lived out. In the end, these men faced their personal prejudices and they sought the fair and just decision. For Juror #8, it was a concern for mercy that seemed to compel his actions in that deliberation room. The actions and words of the 'unmerciful' jurors shows us why mercy is equally as important as justice. Justice without a concern for mercy isn't truly just. When our attempts at ending injustice aren't balanced with mercy, emotions like anger and bitterness steer the wheel. And can any good come from that?

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0050083/plotsummary

Guilt Offerings

2011-07-09T15:20:00.007-04:00

I browsed through my mail yesterday, as I do most days—sifting through the junk and hoping for some Amazon package that I might have forgot I ordered. Then I came upon a World Vision packet. This is nothing new, really. I've made donations to World Vision a number of times, even sponsoring a child for a period. However, this packet struck me a bit differently. I'm not quite sure why.

What struck me about this packet was the pronounced use of guilt being marketed. The Bible verse on the packet is Matthew 25:37, a teaching about sheep and goats. Jesus was teaching his disciples about the kingdom of heaven, and how people who think they're righteous might be in for a surprise when confronted with the fact that they neglected the poor and needy on earth. The most well-known verse from this passage is, "whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me."

Without a doubt, these are powerful words. Jesus struck at the heart of 'lukewarm' faith, for sure. There are a number of organizations and statistics that can tell you if every Christian in the U.S. (around 138 million people) slightly increased their giving each year, then extreme poverty could be eradicated by the year 2035. And I applaud organizations such as World Vision for working to end extreme poverty.

Still, I'm not sure Jesus had a 'guilt marketing tactic' in mind when he spoke those words to his disciples. He was simply calling out hypocrisy. Is that what World Vision is doing? Maybe.

The difference, in my estimation, is that World Vision is a company with employees...and payrolls. But it's hard to blame them for what they're doing. Tackling worldwide poverty and injustice is on a level that is unfathomable to me. Again, I truly commend their work.

But their marketing efforts also got me thinking about why people give, and why we should give. If using guilt is the only way to get a person to give, then so be it. Better to feed a starving child using a guilt marketing method than for that child not to be fed at all. But I wonder sometimes, if most donors give simply because they read a phrase such as, "Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you?" Are they trying to please God by giving money away? Or are they truly concerned for the poor?

I ask this of myself, as well. My wife and I sponsor a child through Compassion International. We sponsor a child because we have the resources to do so, and because it's the right thing to do. Yet we don't take the time to pray enough for our child. We read updates and send a letter to him every now and then, but do we really try to have a bond with this child?

Maybe giving money is enough. Maybe that's all that people can find the time to do. Writing a letter is simply out of the question. Praying for a child in another country might be asking too much when it is more than difficult to even pray for our own family.

Wouldn't it be nice, though, if people could give out of a deep concern for the well-being of others, rather than giving out of guilt?

Scott Todd, a senior adviser at Compassion International, spoke recently about charitable giving by Christians: “It begins with a new hunger—a felt, compelling force within us that desires that kids will not die of preventable causes, that sees the pain and feels it and is almost angry about it and wants it to stop." Scott Todd is the leader of "58" (based on Isaiah 58), an organization backed by ten major non-profit groups to highlight the causes of poverty and to fight against those causes—mostly through the financial assistance of donors.

And so I read Mr. Todd's quote, and then I look at World Vision's packet, and I think...somewhere we're off a little bit. Yes, there will always be poverty. But there still are effective means to save lives and help stop the extreme poverty stuff—lack of education, lack of clean water, lack of food and shelter. My hope is that, someday, organizations like World Vision won't have to use the guilt marketing anymore. I hope that Christians—and everyone else—will give to charities that fight poverty because it's the right thing to do. Salvation isn't based on works or how you spend you're money. If that's the case, then we're all headed to hell. Guilt shouldn't motivate us to do good. God and justice should be our motivators.

Religious Conversations While Getting My Hair Cut

2011-06-25T21:15:00.002-04:00

As I sat in the stylist's chair, the conversation gravitated to what part of town I lived in. From there, which neighborhood. I told her our house is for sale, as my family plans to move to Columbus, Ohio, in about a year. I told her I was going back to school. When asked what I was going to be studying, I said I was going to seminary. She seemed impressed. Then the conversation took the religious turn, which is okay by me... But then this conversation got on the whole "gay marriage – this country is losing its morals" train—then I wasn't so comfortable. I politely said that I think the real problem is that so many pastors and religious people expend so much energy denouncing gay marriage and similar issues, while staying silent on more-pressing ones. Like poverty. And homelessness. And the lack of education and clean water to around two billion people in the world.

And so this conversation was another needed step in my theological development.

I'm finding that I don't like drawing lines in the sand and picking sides. Or picking battles, for that matter. I'd rather rejoice that, through Jesus Christ, grace is given to all. I'd rather celebrate diversity and differing opinions. I'd rather work for justice with my hands, instead of my mouth.

The world is gray, my friends. It is not black and white. Everyone has scars and skeletons in their closet. Everybody is just trying to figure out life the best that they can. Yes, the world is falling apart...but this isn't a new thing. If you believe in good, then you probably believe in evil. Don't act surprised when man's corrupt ways pollute the world we live in. It'll be okay. Tomorrow's another day. And we all have the ability to do some good while we're here.

A Not-So-Simple Challenge

2011-06-13T22:19:00.003-04:00

A challenge:

Choose to put your cell phone away for a week...do not use it. After that week, find someone who is a drug addict. Then say to them, "I understand what you're going through."

Because if you think it's hard to live without a cell phone (or Facebook or e-mail or whatever), then imagine how hard it is for a heroine addict who has become physically dependent on the drug. Cause what I'm seeing in our culture is an addiction to handheld devices. When you see a parent at the playground or in a restaurant with their little child and they are constantly browsing their cell phone, that looks like addiction to me. And it occurred to me that we look down upon drug addicts in our society, while other addictions (texting while driving, for example) seem to be socially acceptable. Addiction is addiction, right? Is a drug addiction more detrimental to others than a texting driver?

Just something to think about. And I say this not as someone who claims exemption from this...I have plenty of addictions. And that's just the point.

Different

2011-06-03T10:06:00.002-04:00

I have to be careful how I write this. I'm not sure I want to influence anyone reading this, because then I really wouldn't be different anymore.

My wife and I have found that we are different. The way we live, the things we embrace...are all pretty different from most of our friends and neighbors. I don't think this was even intentional, but somewhere along the way we decided to stop getting cable TV. Then we started living by a strict budget so that we could get out of debt. (We even go so far as to take a calculator to the grocery store, just to make sure we don't overspend.) Then we chose to cut up our credit cards. We have cell phones, but we don't have a monthly plan with Verizon or AT&T...we use Tracfone, and we only turn our phones on if we absolutely have to. We rent our videos from the local library. We don't take lavish vacations. A fun date night might simply be a quiet dinner and a nice walk around the neighborhood. We like shopping at Goodwill and Half-Priced Books. Then we decided to put our house up for sale, in order to move so that I can go to seminary full time. And I'm not saying any of this to brag. In fact, when you find you are living differently, you need to kind of need to be quiet, because you're going to sound like a jerk if you don't.

Really, I don't know why I'm writing this. Mainly just to ponder why we, as a society, choose to follow the crowd or to stand and be different. Everyone around us seems to be running a hundred miles an hour, and—though we're plenty busy, too—we seem to prefer a slower, less-chaotic pace of life. News and media carry a lot of influence. If you don't have the latest phone...or if you don't know who the final five American Idol contestants are...or if you don't know exactly what storm caused damage in the south...then you must be out-of-touch. Really?

I say all this very humbly, because it's hard to live differently. It's hard to turn off the TV and pick up a book. It's hard to pack your lunch everyday instead of eating out. It's hard to not follow, but to make small choices that seem to go against the grain of culture. Do you ever choose to "not follow"? If so, what everyday things do you do differently?

A Great Reminder For Us Narcissistic Bloggers

2011-05-01T13:51:00.000-04:00

Collide Magazine | Be Careful, Little Blog, What You Flame

The Prayer List

2011-04-26T07:05:00.003-04:00

God, here I am again, trying my best to pray. This list of prayer concerns seems to keep getting longer and longer.

I know. And it's really not a complete list. So many haven't shared their concerns publicly.

I never hear you like this. Why today?

This needs a bit more clarity. I will not often speak this way.

I guess I just feel so burdened when I see this list. So much sadness and sickness. It's so hard to understand.

I know.

I'm really aching for these people...people I know and care about deeply. The disease. The sickness. The fear. It's too much, God.

Why should I pray for this woman with stage-4 terminal cancer, God? I'm not stupid. I know the outcome of this one. What am I supposed to pray for? Her healing? Her peace and comfort through her last days?

Yes. You should pray for all of those things.

But she isn't going to be healed! This is so draining. What about the boy with leukemia? How can I believe in your 'goodness' in light on that situation?

You can't understand how I will work in his life.

Why?!

Just keep praying.

Why should I keep praying for others' healing when no obvious miracle ever happens?

You need to keep praying because it allows you to suffer, on some small level, along with them.

But God, it's so emotionally draining to read about all of this sickness and death. My heart feels heavy.

That's good. That's how I want your heart to feel.

Why do you let your children suffer, God? How can I believe in you, or your goodness, when so many good people suffer for no apparent reason?

You want reason and logic. I do not work in those ways. I work on the inside, where suffering meets joy.

But what kind of God lets his children suffer and die?!

I let my own son suffer and die...and that act may even be too difficult to understand.

You need to let go of your reasoning and simply pray for my will to be done. I give and I also take away. I love and I comfort. I provide. In these things, you need to find some solace.

What if I get cancer, God? What if I become a statistic, too?

There are no statistics in my kingdom. The world you live in is filled with many things...sorrow, evil, pain—and, yes—suffering. It is also filled with joy, hope, and kindness. If the burdens of "why" and "what if" become too heavy, let go and release it to me. I understand your worry...but it will not help you.

Amen, God.

Food Pantry Grace

2011-04-07T19:40:00.004-04:00

A woman came to our church recently to see if we had a food pantry. I told her we did, and then gave her our standard form to fill out. When I returned with a few bags of food, this woman told me she didn't see a line on our form to write what her income was. I told her we don't need to know that particular information, and that we mainly want to keep track of who has used our food pantry and how often they are in need of the service.

This woman's comment about the missing "income" line got me thinking about God's grace.

She was simply operating by the procedures that are standard in the world, where we are "qualified" and "disqualified" based on everything from income level, to intellectual ability, to outward appearances. In the world we live in, everything seems like it has to be "earned."

Our church's food pantry doesn't ask for information about a person's income or current job status because that doesn't reflect how God operates. God simply asks us to come...and receive. God's grace works like this: You've made a mess of your life and you realize it; you muster enough faith to pray; you receive grace. I love the thought that our food pantry tries to work this way, too. Maybe you messed up in your life. Maybe you have an addiction that cost you a job. Maybe you're simply a statistic of a struggling economy. Maybe your boyfriend left and you can't afford food for three kids on a single income. Whatever the reason, we don't care. We simply care that you came to ask for help. There's no box to fill in that asks why you are in need of food assistance. We don't want to know your income level. That's not how God's grace works. We just want to offer some tangible form of grace: food. And like God's grace, it's not something you need to earn and it's not something you have to deserve.

A Great Story In An Unlikely Place: Steak N' Shake

2011-03-29T07:28:00.009-04:00

My family and I were out shopping recently and decided to stop at Steak N' Shake for lunch. It was a Saturday, and the restaurant was crowded. We waited a few minutes, were politely seated, and then were looking over our menus. I noticed a young man walk in and could tell he was an employee. He clocked in and jumped right into work. His first table of the day turned out to be a very interesting sideshow for anyone within view. This waiter was unsteadily carrying his table's soda-and-milkshake order when...yep...the soda spilled all over the table. No big deal, right? These things happen. Well, these things do happen, but, unfortunately, some people are restaurant snobs and have come to think that "these things" shouldn't happen. Ever.

The waiter then apologized and proceeded to clean up the mess. As he returned with the food order and new drinks, I saw this family stand up—I couldn't hear all the words they said, but could read their lips pretty well—and tell the waiter that they were leaving. They seemed quite annoyed and then left, of course, without paying. I was talking about the incident with my wife when I saw another gentleman walk over to this waiter and say, "What's your name, son?" "Joel." "Joel, you're going to be my waiter today. I'll let you get this table cleaned up and then we want to sit here." The man then put his hand on Joel's shoulder, looked at the other waiters, and said, "Joel here is my waiter today." By this point I was more intrigued by this incident than by my own meal.

The mess was cleaned up and Joel waited on his "new" table. Another woman who saw the spilled-soda fiasco offered Joel an encouraging hug as she left. It was so amazing to see the ugliness of man and the generosity of man in that context. You had one family who attempted to belittle this young waiter who accidentally spilled a soda. Then, because of that ugliness, you had several others who stepped up to show the waiter that mistakes happen and life goes on. It was kind of inspiring.

It was great to see that all people aren't selfish jerks. And I mean that in a sincere way. I've seen far too many people talk down to a cashier or a person behind the counter, acting as if they're entitled to some absurd level of service that no person can really achieve. So to see these acts of kindness in a Steak N' Shake was refreshing. It helped me to remember to check my attitude at the door. Those who work in the retail industry are human...they're not robots programmed to meet our every want and need. Treat people with the respect and dignity that you want to be treated with. Especially when they spill a soda.

Smart Phones Don't Make Smart People

2011-03-24T21:49:00.001-04:00

"In 2008 almost 6,000 people were killed and a half-million were injured in crashes related to driver distraction."

"Studies have found that texting while driving causes a 400% increase in time spent with eyes off the road."

"A car driver dialing a cell phone is 2.8 times more likely to get into a crash than a non-distracted driver."

It's no surprise that cell phones and smart phones have caused a great sociological phenomenon. Mobile phone subscriptions worldwide hit 4.6 billion about a year ago, and that statistic is only gaining speed. And they can do everything. The world is at our fingertips. What's ironic, though, is that these "smart" phones are causing people everywhere to act, well, stupid.

Every time I am driving (with my little daughter in the car) and I see someone looking at their cell phone instead of looking at the road, it makes me want to scream. Are we so narcissistic that we think we have to talk to someone else all the time? I know the answer to that one.

Cell phones are great, but, unfortunately, we can't handle them. Like a drug, we just can't let go of our addiction to communication. We have to let people know exactly what we're doing all the time. You know the person, right? The guy who gets on his cell phone as the plane is pulling up to the terminal. He's telling the person on the other line every little detail...where the plane is right now...how fast the plane is going...how many minutes he estimates before he's off the plane. Everyone looks at this guy and thinks, "Gee, buddy. Get a life. Everybody on the plane doesn't need to hear your stupid conversation." Here's the kicker: We're that guy. We're all that guy and we don't even know it. We've become so self-absorbed that we can't go through a single stop light without looking at our messages. We know the risks. We've seen the statistics. We don't really care.

Okay, my rant's gone on long enough. My point? Put down your freakin' cell phone and look at the road. If you hit my car, I will grab your phone and stomp it into pieces.

Statistics from: http://www.edgarsnyder.com/car-accident/cell-phone/statistics.html

2011-03-05T21:53:00.012-05:00

I don't have cable and the antenna for my TV isn't working.

Such is the life of a frugal, challenge-the-status-quo hipster like me. And since my antenna isn't working, I've been doing more reading and have been pretty out-of-touch with any current event. I know there's flooding in my state. I know tensions and violence are still rising in the Middle East. I know Glee is still a hit show. Other than that, I'm useless when it comes to casual conversations about current news and pop culture. So when I turned on the TV today and actually got a few channels, I was surprised at my enlightened realization—that I really wasn't missing anything life-shattering and that my time had been better spent between the pages of my books.

What I also realized is how lazy we let ourselves become. With ever-increasing cable channels comes an ever-increasing temptation to surf the days away. It's so easy for me to think, "I just want to watch TV tonight." What if we weren't so connected to every little slice of news that was happening around the world? I'm not trying to bash TV or the news...I enjoy these things. But I simply realized how easy it has become to turn on the TV and check our brains at the door, rather than open a book and really engage our minds. (And yes, I do believe there are many shows that "engage" our minds, but I also think twenty minutes of channeling surfing to find that "show" does not.)

So the thought I'm really wrestling with here is this: What if we didn't have a TV...within a week we'd grab onto any book or magazine we could find...and that would become our new "TV." How might our lives be enriched by that? Just something to think about.

What about other technologies? What if a son and father actually talked while waiting to be seated, rather than the son, or the dad for that matter, playing with the latest app on their phone? What if we "unplugged" more often? Even while typing this blog, I know a better conversation or a better magazine article awaits in the other room. I'm not trying to ba-humbug TV, or smartphone apps, or Facebook, or Twitter, or NetFlix, or video games. I enjoy TV a lot. But again, it's kind of a revelation when you've been away from the tube for a while, only to come back and find how unfulfilling it can be.

So what are your thoughts in this ongoing dilemma? To stay plugged in, or to unplug? To set aside specific times for TV and Internet, or to live without those boundaries? To be ever connected, or to disconnect for a time?

Just so nobody thinks I'm a total TV snob, I'll admit that I'm a Gleek. I also really dig Modern Family.

New Old Hymns

2011-02-15T12:04:00.034-05:00

Lately I've been inspired by some "new" old hymns sung by Sandra McCracken. I should say right now that I'm typically partial to newer, contemporary worship music. When we sing hymns at my church, I usually feel like I'm about to fall asleep. I love the words to most hymns, but don't always give them the praise they're due. Yes, most hymns are old and very traditional. But so are a lot of other traditions that we annually celebrate, like weddings or the lighting of a Christmas tree.

The churches that we label as "mega," like Rick Warren's Saddleback Valley Community Church or Bill Hybel's Willow Creek Community Church, tend to use contemporary, progressive music and media to draw thousands of worshipers each week. The older, traditional churches that paint our national landscape survive with a few handfuls of worshipers. One style isn't right and the other wrong. I'm simply writing to ponder the differences and beauties of both.

At our church, as with many others, we offer multiple styles of worship. Even within our "modern" service, we play newer, Chris-Tomlin-style songs along with newer versions of classic hymns. There's validity to both styles. Many young worshipers want to sing songs that reflect the style of music on their iPod. Many older worshipers want the familiarity and slower pace of religious hymns. Then there's older people that enjoy the progressive worship songs, and younger worshipers who want a return to the deeper theology present in many hymns.

As I've been listening to more hymns lately, I'm reminded again of the beauty of the language as well as the melody. There are distinct rhyming patterns and sentence structures that coordinate with the number of syllables...and though engaging, they can make you feel like you're singing in circles. There are also times that these phrases seem outdated. I think, "Balm in Gilead? What the heck are they talking about; is that even in the Bible?" Then at other times, the songs sound so much more beautiful because of those ancient words, as if we unlocked a capsule from another place and time. And I'll admit, sometimes it really takes singing a song—or hearing a song being sung—that makes the words come to life. Many of my favorite worship songs I love simply because I've sung them in the company of believers. I'm still learning to embrace music that at first seemed too ancient and foreign for my appeal. However, this journey is opening my eyes—and ears—to the many wonderful ways we've created to praise our Creator.

Below are the words to my favorite "new" hymn, "New Wonders." There is also a link if you'd like to listen to it...which I'd obviously recommend.

"New Wonders"
Sandra McCracken

Link to listen to "New Wonders"

Look again

At the Cross

Where you are found and lost
Make a new song of praise

Fill your cup
At the mouth of the spring
New wonders will we sing
As the Spirit blows the embers of our hearts

Tell a story
Of Jesus Christ
And his promises we write
On the doorway of our house

Hold the mirror
And remember your own face
Brother, do not forfeit grace
As the Savior pleads your pardon with his blood

Look around
Every sparrow, every flower
All creation sings out loud
Of the grand design

You are small
But you are filled with breath and life
If you seek, then you will find
As the Father looks with favor on his child

For the Savior pleads your pardon with his blood

And the Spirit blows the embers of our hearts

RELEVANT and NEUE

2011-01-26T07:34:00.002-05:00

I often find myself unintentionally 'endorsing' movies and music and other things on this blog. I guess it's this stuff of life that inspires me. There are two magazines that I've been reading, one for about six years and the other only very recently—Relevant and Neue. They're both published by the same media group, Relevant Media. Founded by editor Cameron Strang, Relevant Media Group takes a fresh, hip look at Christianity and how it's impacting modern culture.

What I find interesting enough to write about is that these magazines, specifically Relevant, are surviving, if not thriving, in an economy where many magazines, including the similar, very popular, Paste, have had to limit their product to the Internet alone. Maybe Christians have simply stepped up to support Relevant. Maybe Cameron Strang and company have been innovative enough to break economic trends. They started with a magazine and publishing company in 2003. They printed a number of great books and, after dropping the book line, have once again investigated its re-establishment. They launched Relevant.tv and a really popular podcast, free online avenues to further build interest and buzz. They keep their Web site current, with new stories posted daily, so that the print product isn't the only way to stay connected to their content.

Relevant keeps its focus on popular culture and how Christians are working in that culture. They highlight up-and-coming bands, new movies, not-for-profits that are having a real impact, and other bits of news that add to the faith discussion. Neue has its focus on the Church and ministry. It's not a magazine specifically for pastors, but anyone who works or actively volunteers in a church. These magazines are a leading torch for young, progressive Christians who want to know what ministries and what people are making headlines because of their faith and involvement. These magazines are also diamonds in the rough. As I mentioned before, this is a time where the Internet is killing off print products one by one. Every artist and musician also feels the wrath of the almighty Internet. For a publisher to succeed in this time and place is a remarkable feat. When it's a Christian publisher, it's even more impressive.

If you're a Christian who's active in your church, I recommend both of these great magazines. I continue to find the articles challenging and motivating, all at once. I've been reading Relevant for a long time, and the columnists, articles, and direction of the magazine are as good today as in 2003. An iPad app is in the works, and there are plenty more goodies on the assembly line at Relevant Media Group. And I can't wait.
www.relevantmagazine.com

'Christian' Movies?

2011-01-20T16:51:00.006-05:00

While reading a recent review of The Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader, I started thinking about what movies I highly value, and why I value them. The review wasn't scathing, but it certainly wasn't complimentary. The reviewer writes, "I can't get past the feeling, though, that what we're really watching is a child who desperately wants to steal attention away from his older, more impressive cousin, The Lord of the Rings." That one sentence seems to represent what all Christian movies seek—to be just as good a movie as all those popular, 'secular' ones. Some might argue that The Chronicles of Narnia series are simply fantasy movies, but I tend to lump them in with Christian films because they have over-arching themes that represent what Christians value: love, forgiveness, reconciliation, and redemption. Voyage of the Dawn Treader masks its message in allegory and metaphor, but it still should be considered a Christian movie. Really good Christian films use every genre—fantasy, drama, comedy, romance, and even science-fiction—to present the message of the gospel in ways that have mass appeal.

The thought that I'm pondering is, "What makes a movie 'Christian'?" Does it need to be made by a church, such as Facing the Giants or Fireproof? Does it need to be biblical, like The Passion of the Christ or One Night With The King? Does it need to be specifically allegorical, like The Chronicles of Narnia? Or are we even asking the right question all together?

As Christians, why do we need to classify if a movie is 'Christian' or not? I think it comes from our desire to examine and censor all the negative stuff that might compromise our beliefs. But what kind of faith do we have if it can't be stretched and tested....

I always want to show my support for Christian movies, especially when I know a church or Christian organization made the film. For example, I saw the Christian teen-drama To Save a Life recently. Though I enjoyed it overall, I found the ending a bit anti-climatic and some scenes seemed especially forced, as if the producers were trying to prove how 'authentic' the movie was. I sense this with other Christian movies as well, which is part of why I'm writing this blog. Here I want to discuss three of my favorite movies, which all have Christian themes of hope and redemption. I also want to examine why I like these movies, whether or not they're a 'Christian' movie, and what that title really means, anyway.

Gran Torino (2008) starring Clint Eastwood

Gran Torino

The first film—and one of my all-time favorites—is Gran Torino. It's a film about an old man who's enervated by his surroundings. Walt Kolwalski is tired of his family's selfishness, tired of his neighborhood's encroaching multicultural diversity, and tired of the dilapidated and dying state of his once-great city. Despite the curmudgeon that he is, his new Asian neighbors befriend Walt, and he slowly withholds his prejudice. Walt becomes a father-figure to the family's son, and eventually stands up for the boy in inspiring—and unexpected—ways.

A very real and gritty depiction of our complex and diverse world, Gran Torino is rated R for violence and strong language. That can be the off-limits kiss-of-death for many Christian viewers...unless the movie is The Passion of the Christ. Many Christians are hesitant to engage a film that shows a realistic depiction of life...maybe because that reality is cruel and ugly. Gran Torino is one of the most redemptive stories I've seen on film in a long time. It's powerfully acted and by far one of Clint Eastwood's best.

28 Days (2000) starring Sandra Bullock

28 Days

The next film is 28 Days. No, not the zombie film...that's 28 Days Later. The 28 Days I'm referring to stars Sandra Bullock as Gwen Cummings, an alcoholic who can't quite come to grips with her addiction. She's sentenced to twenty-eight days in a rehab facility, where she's forced to confront her erratic lifestyle and what she must do about it. Will Gwen choose her also-alcoholic boyfriend and the life she's used to, or will she stand and fight against her own will?

Like Gran Torino, 28 Days is not a Christian film. Should that disqualify it from being considered by Christians? Movies that have redemptive and hopeful messages should be viewed by Christians, whether or not they've been "Dove-approved." The world we live in is a sinful place...shielding our eyes from films that portray our world realistically doesn't exactly set us up to be disciples to lost and hurting people.

The Second Chance (2006)
starring Michael W. Smith

The Second Chance

Here I've picked a movie that can be considered 'Christian.' The Second Chance was directed by Steve Taylor, who was a successful Christian musician in the 1980s. It also stars popular Christian contemporary musician Michael W. Smith (in his first acting role). I've selected this movie not only because it is a favorite, but also because jaded believers like myself should realize that it's good to acknowledge a remarkable film, whether it's a Christian film or not.

The Second Chance takes a look at two pastors who, though they share a common faith, have to preach to very different sets of people. One is a black pastor who works in the inner city, the other a young, white pastor who works in the wealthy suburbs. When they are assigned to work together, tensions arise and they're forced to face their own prejudice and work through their differences. It's another great story that carries themes of redemption and forgiveness, all through the unique lens of inner-city ministry.

Some Christian movies, such as The Second Chance and To Save A Life, purposely sought a PG-13 rating, which allowed them more freedom to show realism throughout the film. Oddly enough, this sometimes alienates a movie from the Christian audience who should be the most supportive of the work. This blog is to point out that film is one of the best ways we have to depict stories. Christ used parables to illustrate messages of hope and reconciliation with God. We have this very same method, and while we must use it with care and responsibility, we must not forget that Christ came to save lost and broken people. When Christians "sanitize" that redemptive process on film, it's a disservice to the message being communicated. Blogger Mike Duran posed this same thought:

" 'Knowing God' and descending into 'the dark places' of our hearts seems incongruous. As a result, many Christian artists, while touting God’s ability to save anyone, tend to sanitize depictions of the process. We say that God can save people from 'the dark places'—we just don’t want to show 'the dark places.' " 1

If we can choose to see a film's redemptive qualities, and not cast it aside because it portrays the ugliness and brokenness of the world, we might open ourselves up to a beautiful cinematic experience that tells the same story we continually see in the Bible...the story of love overcoming evil.

1 http://mikeduran.com/?p=5055

The Man With The Golden Voice

2011-01-06T13:43:00.006-05:00

If you're a YouTube surfer, you've no doubt seen the popular video that's been posted about Ted Williams, a Columbus-Ohio-based homeless man who claims to have the "God-given gift of a great voice." When the videographer drives up to Ted and offers him a dollar to hear his "great radio voice," you don't expect to hear such a beautiful baritone come from such a disheveled-looking man.

Here's the video, followed by why I'm so touched by it.

Ted Williams and his "golden voice" stand out to me more than any other YouTube clip that's gone viral lately. There's something about his sincerity and admission of past mistakes that makes me want to root for him. I've done a little bit of work with the homeless, and I hurt for these people. We live in a world that doesn't quickly give second chances to strung-out drug addicts and alcoholics. That the Gospel is entirely opposite of how the world treats those 'who have messed up their life' is the reason that I'm drawn to it. The beauty of this story is that this man, Ted Williams, is getting a second chance, all thanks to this video interview. Ted Williams has become a mega-star overnight. And when you hear how the story has unfolded since it was first posted...about getting the chance to reunite with his 92-year-old mother, whom he hasn't seen in years...and about his two-plus years of sobriety...and about the many job offers he's now getting...you just want to stand up and cheer for him. It's not often that you seen a YouTube sensation giving thanks to God on CBS's Early Show for everything in his life, the good and the bad. Ted Williams, if you ever read this little piece of the Web, you've inspired me and I wish you the very best that life can offer.

Twenty-Eleven and Second Chances

2011-01-03T22:26:00.001-05:00

There's something about the start of a new year.

We confess our holiday over-eating, over-spending, and over-indulging and ring in the new year with the promise of a new start at the stroke of midnight. We feel hopeful, as if what happened last year doesn't matter anymore—we can start over and try again. I love this. I love new beginnings. I somehow find new motivation...to exercise more, to live a healthier lifestyle, and to be a better person.

Twenty-eleven also makes me think about God's grace.

Christians know all about God's grace, yet usually have a hard time comprehending and accepting it. It's a topic that I'm definitely passionate about, because if we miss the point on this one, then nothing else about the Christian faith really matters. Why do people embrace a new year? Probably because of the hope and promise that lie within it. This is just what grace does for us. Grace is basically God's free gift of forgiveness to anyone who wants it. And grace, like a new year, is all about second chances.

Most of us continually let ourselves down. We gained too much weight last year. We didn't save enough money. We worked too much. We didn't spend enough time with our family. A new year offers us a chance to fix all the stuff we screwed up the year before. My question for everyone reading this, is simply: Why wait for a new year for a second chance?

God's grace comes to us immediately...in fact, it's as close as a whisper. Jesus came to offer mercy to sinners, not to people who thought they had it all together. Let's not live in our past mistakes. Let's not beat ourselves up over what we didn't accomplish last year. To this point, Martin Luther had a great saying: "Sin bravely." Sure, we all screw up. But you know what? There's forgiveness. And who doesn't long for a second chance? God's forgiveness is a reality that needs to be thought about...deeply. Many people feel a sense of hope on New Year's day. I hope these people can know that one day a year is too short a space for hope and forgiveness. We need to embrace it every second of every day. As often as we feel we need forgiveness, it's there. Embrace hope and forgiveness in the same way you embrace a new year, with a willingness to forget the past and a motivation to live today better.

Blog Or Not To Blog...

2010-12-17T16:57:00.006-05:00

I've got a real problem. I love to read Web logs, write them, review them, critique them, and so forth. I like to see friends' status updates and their day-to-day meanderings. But there's a dark side to all of this that's troubling to me. And that's where the "POST A COMMENT" section comes in. You've seen it. It's that section of a Web page that follows any online article, status update, tweet, blog, etc. Sarcastically translated, it means "LEAVE YOUR UNIMPORTANT, SELF-RIGHTEOUS, JUDGMENTAL OPINION HERE."

And that's where my problem lies.

Yes, I do love to read a great online article. It's one of my favorite past-times. Then I reach the end of the article, only to get sucked into the growing list of reviewer comments that tear through the writer's work like an eighth-grade grammar teacher. It's pathetic, really. Instead of submitting an article to a magazine on their own, these "reviewers" quickly pound out their criticism on the keyboard and send it into cyberspace. What's the point? Do these comments really further the global dialogue of the Internet, or do they simply give us more anonymous ways to be a jerk?

I guess the point I'm trying to make, albeit in a snarky way, is that this "Post A Comment" era of the Internet is a total catch-22. The beauty of the Internet is that the world can engage in open, digital dialogue. The ugliness of the Internet is that the anonymity it provides enables the world to post hateful, judgmental comments without realizing there's a real human being on the receiving end.

Some will say, "Hey, if you don't want negative feedback, then don't post your stuff online." While that's a true statement, it's still helpful to use a little "golden-rule" moral compass in one's life—even on the inconsequential Internet.

Here's the kicker: When I click "Publish Post," the little comment button is going to be right there, waiting for the click of another critic-to-be. Ironic, isn't it?

Letter To A Friend

2010-11-27T15:22:00.008-05:00

This letter is to a brother, a friend, those who are important to me. This letter is written because I've noticed something in you. You seem a bit distraught...a bit distant. You're struggling right now. Life is hard and it's been beating down on you lately. I can honestly say I know how you feel. Not a week goes by that I don't doubt myself.
Still, I want you to know that I've noticed how you feel. I want you to know that your life is important. Your presence is felt...and it matters. I'm praying for you. And if that doesn't matter to you, that's okay. Doubt and bitterness are a part of life, too. Cherry-coating things doesn't help. Shit happens and sometimes life sucks. Sometimes nothing anyone can say will make you feel better. But you...well, I know you. You can rise above. You can choose to stay positive. You don't have to believe you're worth it—I can believe that for you right now. You should know, though, that you are worth it. You're worth the life you live. Rise above the things that bring you down. Why? I can't answer that for you. But I can stand by your side and say that there are good days and bad days. We live for the good days and we embrace them. Keep moving forward. The road ahead is open and waiting for you. I'll end with a line from a great song by Matt Maher called "Hold Us Together"—"[Love] won't fix your life in five easy steps...but it's all you need / And I'll be my brother's keeper, so the whole world will know that we're not alone / This is the first day of the rest of your life."

Why Do You Believe?

2010-11-01T17:02:00.001-04:00

I had a good conversation with a family member recently. They talked about taking a Bible class at church, and how difficult it was to understand the Old Testament. Rules. Exile. Punishment. Death. More rules. They were really struggling with the God of the Old Testament and how to make sense of their faith in light of what they were reading and studying. This family member came to three conclusions, and didn't really like any of those three:

Take the Bible very literally, in which case they didn't want to follow a God like the one of the Old Testament
God must have wrongly-predicted the actions of his creation, thus making God fallible
Assume the Bible is written by imperfect humans, who—though inspired by God—misinterpreted many things that God said to them

These are some hard conclusions to arrive at. I have thought about these conclusions and agree with this family member. The Old Testament is an extremely difficult set of narratives to accept. So, then, what are we left with? Unbelief? Doubt? A pointless faith?

Why do we continue to believe?

I can only speak for myself. In a world that tempts my doubt, I continue to believe because I want to believe in a God who is a champion for the hopeless. God, and the Church, are meant to be a shining light in the darkest of dark places. God is a haven for those rejected by the world. For those who are unloved and unaccepted, God accepts. At least that's what the Bible teaches. Jesus was a defender for the weak, poor and oppressed. The world is full of these people. Those who don't like the way they look; those who can't love themselves; those whose past sins continue to pour guilt upon them; those who don't feel accepted by any one. God exists for those people most of all. And when you identify with those people, you're likely to find God. And when you find God, the confusing words of the Old Testament don't seem to matter.

So why do you believe? Responses welcome...

Hair Metal Theology, Á La Poison

2010-09-30T15:46:00.004-04:00

I recently attended a lecture by Dr. Gale Yee, who is a professor of biblical studies at the Episcopal Divinity School in Cambridge. The lecture's topic was "Answering God's Call: Bringing Justice To All." She related our call as Christians to the United Nation's eight Millennium Development Goals that aim to end extreme hunger and poverty. What a task. End poverty? End hunger? Can these goals even be achieved? After pondering her lecture, I think that extreme poverty and hunger can be eradicated, even if all poverty and hunger is not.

This lecture on the world's poor also made me think of an early 90's song by glam-rockers Poison. The song is "Something To Believe In." You remember it, right? Well, ironically enough, from the band that brought us such classics as "Nothin' But A Good Time" and "Unskinny Bop" came a very profound anthem about life's tragedies. I thought about the lyrics in that song...

I drive by the homeless sleeping on a cold dark street
Like bodies in an open grave
Underneath the broken old neon sign
That used to read, 'Jesus Saves'

A mile away live the rich folks
And I see how they're living it up
While the poor they eat from hand to mouth
The rich drinkin' from a golden cup

And it just makes me wonder
Why so many lose and so few win

So amidst all of that hair metal, there's actually some pretty good theology. Why is the gap between the rich and the poor so great? Have you ever noticed the distance between a city skyscraper and a street lined with dilapidated houses? Probably about a mile. A single mile. Within three or four blocks, you have some of the tallest, richest financial buildings in the world and some of the poorest, run-down neighborhoods in the country. And that's in America, the land of plenty. If you've ever traveled to Haiti, or India, or Africa, or a host of other countries, you know that the poverty we see here in America doesn't compare to the poverty in the rest of the world.

Can we really end poverty and hunger? What actions can we take? Why do so many lose and so few win? I think a large part of the problem lies in that previous lyric. So many "lose" and so few "win" because the ones who have won don't share and distribute fairly to those who haven't won. We live in a "I'm-looking-out-for-me" world, and in a world like that, there will always be extreme poverty. Jesus spoke to this point, saying that "you will always have the poor among you" (Matt. 26:11). And though there will always be poor among us, that doesn't mean we should ignore their need while we go about our busy little lives. We can and should do all that we can to help the poor and destitute. For me that might mean giving money to a reputable organization, supporting local and fair-trade businesses, tithing to my church, and praying for those around the world. What does it mean for you? I can't answer that, but I do know doing nothing shouldn't be your answer.

The Law, Grace, And A Purple Bracelet

2010-09-24T16:43:00.004-04:00

I've been pondering the law and grace lately. In Christian terms, the law and grace are spiritual opposites. The law represents the rules that God laid down in the Old Testament (Ten Commandments, Levitical rules, etc.) The law also represents a common mindset where many Christians think that they have to act "good enough" in order for God to be pleased with them. The other side of this coin is grace. Grace is the knowledge that we'll never be good enough to please God—and he still loves us, anyway. Grace is knowing that there's nothing we can do to earn—or to unearn—God's love and acceptance. The second part of that is the really important part: there's nothing we can do to unearn God's love. When you can come to a point of accepting that, then you've found salvation's road.

That brings me around to a purple bracelet. This isn't just any purple bracelet. It's a "Complaint-Free World" bracelet, courtesy of acomplaintfreeworld.org. A Complaint-Free World is a non-profit organization dedicated to helping people affect positive change in their lives by becoming Complaint Free. I'm always kind of weary of these gimmicks. Maybe I shouldn't use the word "gimmick," but c'mon...how can a purple bracelet help my life? Here's the idea: You wear this bracelet and every time you complain, you move the bracelet to the opposite wrist. This provides you with an awareness of how often you complain. So I'm once again giving this purple bracelet a try. You put it on, sit back, and let it work.

So how does this bracelet relate to the law and grace?

It relates because grace is the idea that we can't do anything of our own power to please God (Romans 3:22-24). So why should I waste my time with a bracelet? Isn't that like trying to obey a law to please God? For me, I think wearing this bracelet is like prayer, or a good friend, or even a good book. There are things in life that are good and are gifts of God to help us along. This bracelet won't grant me instant happiness...but it's a tool toward that end. It's accountability. I know God doesn't want me to complain and this bracelet provides the awareness I need to rid myself of it.

And just like prayer, I'll sit back and let it work. I won't worry every time I screw up and complain about something. I'll put the bracelet on the other wrist and start again. There's a truth in that. Mess up...and start again. Be forgiven...and start again.

My Role

2010-08-21T21:01:00.000-04:00

There's one sure and true fact in which I take great joy. It's my role as Lydia's father. You see, in this role I am the one man in the world who loves her more than any man ever will. It's kind of a simple concept: No other man, not even a future husband, will love her as much as I do. That's my role and I cherish it.

Still, it's sometimes hard to be a dad. For me, it means giving up a lot of personal time. It means putting forth more exuberance and enthusiasm than I want to give at 8:30 at night, after a very long day of work. Of course it has its rewards. Nothing makes me happier than to see her smile. I'm as tired and also as happy as I've ever been in life. Most parents can probably echo these sentiments. So here's to parents...let us keep pouring out the love that overflows within us.

Blogging Dumb Theology

2010-07-13T14:16:00.008-04:00

Today I came across a very funny (and poignant) comic by artist and blogger Rob Woodrum http://soulsurfer.wordpress.com

This comic made me laugh and sigh, concurrently. I realize that blogging is a little self-absorbed and can come across as super-pious. Still, I love writing my thoughts on faith and life and the crap that we all deal with.

As Rob's comic so hilariously illustrates, I'm also well aware that blogging can be dangerous territory. You might offend someone. You might draw fire. You might spur difficult discussion.

It's also ironic to me that I blog about my Christian faith, because I realize how little we all know about God. I mean, sure, we have the Bible and centuries of religious tradition. But hundreds of different denominational viewpoints all lead me to this conclusion: We've got dumb theology. We don't really know as much as we think we do. We try to make sense of contradicting Bible passages and use a lot of phrases like, "Well I just feel that God wants me to be happy and so I'm doing this thing blah blah blah." There are some people that think God gives us temptations in order to test our faith. Others think Satan is the king of temptations. Anyway, it's all dumb theology. But I mean that in the nicest way. I mean that I'm dumb when it comes to understanding the fullness of God. And so are you. So I'll try to always write with that realization firmly in my dumb mind.

Layers

2010-07-07T23:20:00.014-04:00

This blog entry might get a little deep, spiritually-speaking, so if reading deep thoughts isn't your thing, then back out now. It's okay. I won't be offended. Thanks for taking a look just the same.

However, if you dig some deep thoughts and discussion, then go ahead and dive in. The water is deep here, but it might also be refreshing.

So I'm reading Philip Yancey's short book, Church: Why Bother? It's his personal pilgrimage on accepting the Church, faults and all. Yancey uses several remarkable metaphors to describe the ideal church, and one in particular ignited some curiosity in me. In one of Yancey's final metaphors, he describes the Church as God's welfare office, "an institution set up to heal the blind, set free the captive, feed the hungry, and bring Good News to the poor" (67). While I agree with this great metaphor, it also caused me to question its validity. You see, earlier in this book Philip Yancey also made a clear distinction between families and institutions. To paraphrase, he writes:

Institutions are based on status and rank. A soldier in the Army has stripes on a uniform that tell everyone exactly where he or she stands. A student's status begins with the As, Bs, Cs, Ds, and Fs of the first grade. In the business world, salary and job title signify one's status. In institutions, status is based on performance. Families don't work this way. A child "earns" the family's rights simply by virtue of birth. An underachieving child isn't kicked out of the family; in fact, a child with special needs might receive more attention than the other siblings. Similarly, in God's family, we are plainly told, "there is neither Jew nor Greek, male nor female, slave nor free." All artificial distinctions melt away under the sun of God's grace.

So institutions are—by design—not the most "gracious" places. Yet in the metaphor of a welfare office, we do see grace. We see an institution set up to provide for those in need. This is what the Church should be. And, for the most part, this is what the Church is.

Though some institutions are good and do provide grace to a hurting world, the Church should be careful not to become an institution for the reasons paraphrased above. Institutions—even a welfare office—run by the rules of ungrace. One has to qualify to receive welfare. One has to prove that they are deserving of that assistance. We live in a world that says, "What have you done to earn my respect and approval?" Can't a person just be loved and forgiven, regardless of their past? I know justice has to play its role, but who made us the judge of someone else's worth?

Consider this: a church offers a free food pantry for the community. No requirements. No background checks. Just show up and receive a week's worth of groceries, no questions asked. That would be an example of grace. Consider that same food pantry, now with their number of clients exceeding the number of food donations. A screening system would have to be set up to determine who has the greatest need for food. Is this grace? Certainly this church would have to determine a system that fairly gives food to those most in need. But grace might extend an extra helping hand, such as offering a month of free financial counseling to the persons turned away from the food pantry, allowing them to better manage the mishandled money that put them in need of a food pantry in the first place. Simply put, grace goes the extra mile.

I also think about our prison system. In America, a person commits a crime, serves their sentence, and then is sent back out into a community that's largely unwilling to help them integrate back into society. Many ex-offenders cannot even return home because those convicted of drug crimes are barred from public housing. This is ungrace. The effects of ungrace?—today, of all ex-offenders on parole, two-thirds are re-arrested within three years. However, grace is shown through programs like the Re-entry Court in Fort Wayne, Indiana, which provides supervision and counseling for ex-offenders.

Officials say Fort Wayne's Re-entry Court works—in its first year, only 3 out of 55 participants in the program returned to prison because it provides the offenders with resources such as counseling to make a life for themselves. Offenders are three times less likely to return to prison if they have gainful employment. In a country where most ex-offenders are released from prison and simply given $100 and a bus pass, programs like these seek to show grace by helping these persons find employment, housing, and support.

I am stuck on this concept right now: Grace vs. Ungrace. There's many layers to it. We live in a world that needs rules and justice. At the same time, those rules sometimes keep a person from receiving forgiveness and a second chance. There's a quote I heard that says, "Some people break the law; others are broken by the law." I, too, judge people by the world's rules. Is this person worthy of my time and energy? Has this person hurt me or betrayed me in the past? We don't often offer clean slates. God does offer clean slates and—though we know this—we can't seem to imitate.

What would your life look like if you offered grace to every one? How would people respond if you didn't condemn? If you didn't hold grudges? If people didn't have to be "worthy" of your time or affection? If you can answer these questions, you might have a glimpse of grace.

Video Entry

2010-06-03T09:28:00.000-04:00

This blog entry is simply a video I put together showcasing my daughter's newest skill: walking. It's been amazing to watch how rapidly she has learned this feat. In one week's time, she went from taking one or two assisted steps, to pulling herself up and traversing every room of the house. Incredible.

Way to go, Lydia!

Embrace Today

2010-05-26T15:03:00.002-04:00

Today I make a commitment. It's a commitment not just to myself, but to my wife and daughter. It's a commitment to throw negativity aside and embrace the joys of life. Negativity and complaint too often direct our daily attitudes. They then spread like a virus to others we spend time with. Do we really have it that bad? Is life really that distressing? Look hard and we'll find others in far worse situations. And while I'm not here to explain why bad things happen to good people or why life is, at times, so very difficult, I do know this: staying positive is the key to life. Whether a person of faith or not, if you embody a positive spirit, you're better off for it and you're living what God wants for you. So this is my commitment to see all that's good in life.

There will still be irritations and frustrations, for sure, but I commit today to look for the good. Below is a video of my 1-year-old daughter, Lydia, learning to walk. What a marvel it is to see this little girl take her first steps. Here's to you, Lydia, and to life. Carpe diem.

Two Sides Of One Very Important Scenario

2010-05-13T15:46:00.000-04:00

Recently I read a chapter of Anne Lamott's Traveling Mercies memoir that once again caused me to look deeper at life and faith. Anne describes a friend—a mother who has an alcoholic daughter. This daughter lives at a shelter, and is constantly furious at her mother—yet still accepts the $1,000 a month her mother sends her for expenses. The daughter in this story doesn't seem to recognize her mother's love—the love which sends her money every month. It's in this simple story that I saw two important points to consider.

I realized there are two sides to this scenario, and it's all too easy to be on either one.

Scenario One: We're the mad, furious child who hates his parents but still gladly accepts money, food, and shelter. Scenario Two: We're the proud, arrogant child who refuses to accept money, food, and shelter from his parents. Both of these scenarios are very dangerous.

Have you ever found yourself in either one?

Most of us have probably experienced one side of this scenario, if not both. I find a lot of spiritual truth in these two scenarios. In the first, we're the selfish, immature child who has never known a life without handouts. In the second, we're the world-weary child who has fallen flat on our face, but still refuses a helping hand due to our own arrogant pride.

I see Jesus in these two scenarios, too. Either we choose to rebel, despite the continual forgiveness and acceptance he offers, or we're too proud to even acknowledge that we need his help. In the first scenario, the child doesn't recognize the love behind his source of money, food, and shelter. He just takes it for granted. In the second scenario, the child recognizes what he needs, but is determined to get it by himself—or die trying. The key for all of us is in finding the balance of recognizing our need for Jesus's forgiveness and also asking for it.

Thoughts On Jennifer Knapp, Media Interviews, Condemnation, Love, Music, And Homosexuality

2010-05-11T11:42:00.016-04:00

This blog is a general response to the Larry King Live interview in April featuring musician Jennifer Knapp. Jennifer Knapp is a grammy-nominated, Dove-award winning Christian musician who left the music scene eight years ago, exhausted and confused from the wild ride of "celebrity" that had befallen her. Her re-emergence into music comes full circle today, as her new album, Letting Go, is released nationwide.

http://www.jenniferknapp.com/in-the-press/larry-king-live-interview

Jennifer Knapp was unfortunately featured on CNN's Larry King Live last month for one reason and one reason only: debate. The debate surrounded the long-standing question: Can a person be gay and still be a Christian? Again, I say her role on Larry King Live was unfortunate because CNN and Larry King care only for ratings, not for the health and well-being of those featured on their program. On this program, Jennifer Knapp discussed her re-entry into music and her recent announcement that she is a lesbian. I enjoyed the show, for sure, and found it very interesting. I also was very disenchanted, once again, at the way that Christians in the media are portrayed (and the way they even portray themselves). The show also featured Pastor Bob Botsford of San Diego's Horizon Christian Fellowship Church and Ted Haggard, who was a renowned televangelist until several years ago, when a drug and homosexual scandal collapsed his career as a pastor in Colorado. Pastor Botsford was invited to the show because of a blog he'd written, saddened to hear of Jennifer Knapp's sexual preference "choice," as he described it. But Pastor Botsford was really invited on the show to be the opposing and condemning voice to Jennifer's own perspective. This is what saddens me—that Christians allow themselves to fall into the obvious "traps" set by cable television and other media outlets. But I digress.

Jennifer Knapp has always presented herself as a humble seeker of God, presenting herself as one who is at times unsteady in her faith, and at other times comforted and inspired by that faith. This meek and reserved perspective on the Christian faith has been the building force to her fanbase. In other words, people relate to her lyrics and her humble perspective. Jennifer Knapp presented herself in this same manner on Larry King Live, carefully explaining how she wishes not to be a stumbling block to anyone, but also compelled to be honest with herself and her sexual orientation. Pastor Bob Botsford made several biblically-accurate points, but completely missed the boat on other points. His first mistake was even showing up on the show. Right there he fell into CNN's "trap." He is now probably seen as the 'hypocritical, holier-than-thou preacher' by all who viewed the show. His second mistake was in not having an intellectual conversation with Jennifer. Jennifer Knapp tried to explain that her view of homosexuality is based on the premise that it's not a sin at all—that the Greek words translated as "homosexual" in the Bible aren't the same descriptions we use for homosexuality today. This is a valid point. It's a point that can be opposed, for sure, but it's still worth discussing with grace and intelligence. This did not happen. Judgment and scorn littered the discussion, making it a quarrel among believers (also condemned in the Bible) instead of a loving, graceful, agree-to-disagree conversation.

Ted Haggard thankfully added that voice of grace, though he, too, is just a man that interprets the Bible in one certain way. The ironic thing that has stuck with me is how Pastor Bob Botsford was so easily able to look at certain biblical passages—such as the story of the Pharisees who wanted to throw stones and kill a woman caught in adultery—and overlook other passages where Jesus instructs his disciples not to condemn your Christian brothers. In the pastor's biblical example, he did not mention that Jesus, the only person without sin, was the only one able to tell the adulterous woman to "go and sin no more." For the rest of us sinners, Jesus's teachings to remove the plank from our own eye need to be understood. While some of the apostle Paul's New Testament writings don't jive well with some of Jesus's teachings, I'm still gonna go with Jesus's ultimate commands of loving your neighbor and not judging your fellow man over Paul's rules and regulations that can be interpreted in various ways. While I understand Pastor Botsford's concern for Jennifer Knapp's spiritual well-being, Larry King Live is not the best avenue for a fruitful discussion...I can't believe people don't recognize that in the first place.

Jennifer Knapp's music remains faithful to God. Her sexuality and her interpretation of biblical texts doesn't require condemnation. Love covers a multitude of sins. These are the points of grace that I'm left with after watching Jennifer Knapp's CNN interview. May we all quietly work out our salvation with "fear and trembling" (Philippians 2:12).

Don't Judge Me! No, Wait—I Need Your Judgment!

2010-05-10T14:03:00.002-04:00

We, the twenty-first centurists, have become quite adept at tolerance, quick to keep our judgments to ourselves. We wouldn't dare offend anyone.

I'm just like you. I hate judging others. The plank of wood in my own eye is so big that I'm astounded I can still see other people's mistakes. But as I've been thinking about judgment lately, I've wanted to examine it a bit deeper. I actually believe we all secretly, and maybe subconsciously, enjoy being judged.

It seems to me that most of us love validation. I know I do. We feel affirmed and proud after passing a class, getting hired for a new job, completing a project at home, seeing our child succeed, or being praised for a job well done. Isn't this validation all based on judgment? Don't we secretly yearn for the praises of our peers?

I realize that, as a Christian, judgment is a hot-button topic. My point here isn't to give a thorough exegesis on the contradictory voices in the New Testament that both condemn the throwing of stones while approving the removal of evil ones among the flock. Paul's instructions to the church at Corinth about chasing away "any of your own people who are evil" leaves me bewildered and disturbed every time I read it. All I want is to simply ponder the irony that we all live in. We get angry when someone "judges" us, yet we always seem to need the validation of other people.

I'd love to think that I find my total worth in God and in that faith, but let's be honest. I always seem to crave that proverbial 'pat on the back.' Most of us do. Though I still strongly believe that considerable care needs to be heeded whenever we make a judgment call on someone's character, I also find it funny that only critical judgments are found to be offensive. It's all right for us to judge someone approvingly, but when that judgment takes the form of criticism or disapproval, then we suddenly become a hypocrite. Really?

I'm still not sure on this issue. It seems to me Jesus could have easily approved throwing stones at 'certain' people—those that claim to be Christians but aren't living what they claim to believe. Jesus didn't give any of those specifics, though. He simply taught that we are to take a long, hard look in the mirror before we cast any judgment—and what he really meant is that by looking in that mirror, we'll see that we are sinners, too, and have no room to pass judgment.

Still, we yearn for validation...and someone's gotta make a judgment of us before they validate us. It's a funny conundrum—'you can only judge me if you're going to say something that doesn't challenge my comfort zone!' Well, at least it makes sense to me now...sort of.

A Troubling Conversation With God

2010-04-12T12:41:00.001-04:00

I've been troubled lately by something rather odd—terms of heartfelt concern and support. When someone suffers a loss, almost all are quick to say, "I'm very sorry for you. Know that you're in my heart and prayers," or, "I'm praying to God that he will give you the comfort you need." And, because I'm a Christian, I understand where these condolences come from and am tempted to say them, too.

But these words also hurt.

These words hurt because they only acknowledge a faith where God is not questioned. They don't seek answers, only comfort and restoration. But we're human, right? We also desire some type of answer, some type of, "Why the hell did this happen, God?" But we can't ask that, right? That's irreverent! Wrong. It's not irreverent. It's real. It's a difficult and troubling conversation with a God who sometimes seems very distant. Psalm 88 says it like this:

But I, O LORD, cry out to you;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.
O LORD, why do you cast me off?
Why do you hide your face from me?
I suffer your terrors; I am desperate.

Let me tell you this: God welcomes our questions. It's okay to admit that life sucks sometimes and that there are simply no answers. And while we all need glimpses of hope, sometimes those glimpses come too soon and they simply don't help.

It's hard to be a person of faith when life deals you a bad hand. It's hard to see God working together all things for good when you're in the middle of a tragedy. Maybe it's best in these times to simply say, "I hurt for you," rather than, "I'm praying that God will help you through this." Even if we hope that God will make sense out of the senseless, maybe it's not best to say that. It might be too much for a person to bear. I'm not sure why these condolences bother me the way they do—I haven't suffered a tragic loss recently. Maybe these condolences bother me because I deeply hurt for those who are suffering. Maybe it's because I hate sorrow and tragedy. Maybe it's really because I personally don't know how to see God in times of dire despair.

I'll close with a quote from Dr. Marti Steussy, my current Old Testament professor at Christian Theological Seminary. She said:

Faith is staying in conversation with God; it's not always saying the right or proper things.

This is my conversation.

My NC-17 Bible: A Humorous (And Sarcastic) Musing On Religion And Life

2010-03-31T15:47:00.003-04:00

Lately I've been inspired by Anne Lamott. She's an atheist-turned-Jew-turned-Christian hippie gal from San Francisco. I dig her. A lot. Recently I read an old book review of her eloquent memoir, Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts On Faith. It got me thinking about the Bible and the accepted norms in the world of Christian culture. I know a number of people who would condemn me for watching a R-rated film—because I'm a Christian. Apparently, Christians aren't supposed to watch film or television with bad language in it. I guess this means I should watch what I say, too. While I understand concerns that many Christians have about 'becoming like the world,' I personally find it hard to live in a world where you attempt to shelter yourself from every outside influence imaginable.

So what does all of this have to do with Anne Lamott? Well, Anne Lamott's Traveling Mercies is a book you probably won't find at your local Christian bookstore. Why not? Because there's bad language in it. Ssshhh. Don't tell anyone. Anne Lamott's conversion to Christianity was actually real and messy. She drank and smoked dope and did cocaine and all sorts of other damaging habits. She cussed and fought with God for a while. Then she gave in and accepted a Savior who had been right there through her darkness. That Anne Lamott's Traveling Mercies is a book on the fringes of Christian culture was enough to pique my interest. I love the book. It's raw and messy and beautiful.

Other thoughts: If I'm not supposed to watch R-rated films or cuss or any of that bad stuff, then is it still okay to read my Old Testament? There's some pretty rough language in there. The prophet Ezekiel was one of the worst. In his metaphoric way, he described the people of Israel as a prostitute and a whore for the way they had betrayed their God. And God's response to their promiscuous ways is really bad. God, who obviously feels betrayed and angry, tells Israel that he's going to hand them over to their "lovers," who will "band together in a mob to stone you and run you through with swords" (Ezk. 16:40). All this is in the Bible. Really. Look it up.

Now I understand the marriage metaphor that was used to describe God's love—like a husband's—for his 'wife,' Israel. I understand that the prophet Ezekiel had to use words and imagery that would shock and anger his audience in a way that would get their attention. Still, the content is brutal—violence, rape, battery, mutilation. And while this doesn't really hinder my faith, it does provide for some curious fodder to write about. It causes me to stop and ask if I should really be concerned about watching movies that contain violence and language when my own Bible carries with it much worse content.

I really like the recent Clint Eastwood film, Gran Torino. It's a great story that hits on hard topics such as racial prejudices, anger, violence and peer pressure. It's also a very redemptive story of an old, hostile man changing for the better. I could be criticized for enjoying a film such as this. After all, the f-bomb is dropped like a hot potato—a lot. There's gang violence and brutality and other sinful subject matter throughout. At times I even question whether I should fill my mind with all of this stuff. That's where the irony of biblical history comes into the picture. It's the same story of acceptance, betrayal, and finally redemption that we see time and time again in history.

The bottom line is that God loves you no matter what you've done or what you will do. Anne Lamott was as broken as they come. Yet, as she quotes in her book a Leonard Cohen song, "There are cracks, cracks, in everything, that's how the light gets in." Only in our brokenness can we see our need for a redeemer.

Now go out and buy Traveling Mercies and then rent Gran Torino. Then relax, say a prayer, and know you're a loved and forgiven child of God.

Understanding Grace

2010-02-17T14:05:00.002-05:00

At the church where I'm employed and attend, we focus a lot on grace. At first this struck me as nice, but maybe a little too nice. I kind of wondered why the focus of sermons and studies wasn't more balanced, also discussing such theological issues like consequences, failings, etc. But as time has passed, I understand better the necessity of learning about grace.

Let's be honest — grace is not easy. To show grace and to receive grace are hard things to do. Our society functions much like a business. You have to earn your keep. Your main goal should be to get ahead and make lots of money. We aren't quick to trust others. We've been mislead before and now we're jaded. Think for a minute about this scenario: you see a street panhandler near your local Wal-Mart. You just want to get home and here's this person asking you for money. How do you normally react to a scenario like this? Many people wonder how the panhandler will spend the money he or she is given. Some will think that the panhandler should seek assistance through a local mission instead of begging. Others will be angry that this panhandler isn't working and isn't doing anything to earn any money. Some will simply be too scared or intimidated to approach the panhandler. All of these reactions, though normal, speak to our human nature in this world. It's a world with little grace to be found. At the heart of our reactions to this hypothetical panhandler is this: we want to have control. We want to have control of where we give our money and even over the way others spend "our" money. If we deem a person undeserving, then we won't give them our charity. This is reasonable, but it's surely not grace.

We think in terms of earning and deserving. These are normal, reasonable methods of judgment, but it's not the way of grace. In fact, Martin Luther bluntly wrote that "Reason is a whore, the greatest enemy that faith has." The reasonable way is helping only those who deserve help. The reasonable way is giving to those who are really, truly in need. But does this really add up? Who really deserves anything? And what about those that don't deserve help, or haven't earned the right to assistance? Maybe we should just send them to the gutter with a get-a-job-,-you-lazy-chump kick in the butt. The way our minds naturally operate might not be the right way of thinking at all.

It's not very easy to adopt an attitude where we see everything we have as given to us by God in the first place. It's even more difficult to relinquish control of our money and power. Our identities are based so much on where we work and what neighborhood we live in. What kind of car we drive. What clothes we wear. Again, these might be reasonable things to judge each other by, but it's not grace.

So what if we don't have the high-paying job that we could have had? So what if we don't drive a car that's less than 5 years old? So what if that person has more than me? Grace is about acceptance without limitations. Grace is about speaking positively about people you don't like. Grace is about giving someone the benefit of the doubt. Grace is also about keeping our judgments to ourselves. Grace is not easy at all.

I believe we all have a deep longing to be accepted, whether it's by a family member, our peers, or even a mysterious God that seems so distant. The news of grace is that it's already been offered to us. Embrace it. Soak it in. There's freedom in grace. Here's the kicker: it's when we truly let our guard down and admit that we're human and judgmental and misguided that we can really accept grace. C.H. Spurgeon wrote, "We hold that man is never so near grace as when he begins to feel he can do nothing at all." When we can look at ourselves and say, "Wow, I've really got my attitude and priorities twisted," that's when we're ready for grace.

Confused By "Blessings"

2010-01-01T17:34:00.010-05:00

While not trying to start 2010 on a pessimistic note, I've been wanting to write about the topic of blessings, and specifically, my confusion over the concept of blessings. Christians love to say things such as, "Have a blessed day," or, "I feel so blessed." We thank God for the "blessings" in our lives. I do this, too, so it isn't lost on me...at least not totally. Still, I am always a little confused when a Christian, or anyone for that matter, talks about how blessed they are or how many blessings they believe are in their life.

To me, saying that you're "blessed" implies that those who don't have the amenities that Americans have—or those in other developed countries—are not "blessed." I guess I'm just irritated by what most people define as blessings. I am still trying to understand the biblical history of the word and what it meant to the people at that time. Moses wrote in chapter 23 of the book of Exodus, "Worship the LORD your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you, and none will miscarry or be barren in your land. I will give you a full life span." Other biblical references to blessings indicate that blessings can be spiritual or material. If a blessing is God's special favor or mercy on someone, then how do we explain the conditions that over half the world live in? Are those who sleep on dirt floors and fall asleep hungry cursed? Are their blessings just harder to distinguish than ours? Do we define our own blessings?

I believe I am blessed. I have a wonderful family, have enough money for each day and a comfortable place to rest my head each night. By the world's standards, I'm blessed. I have a relationship with God, a life with purpose and an inner peace. In spiritual terms, I'm blessed. But still the lingering questions remain. Are those without enough food or money or good health not blessed? And if I didn't have enough food or money or good health, would I still have faith, purpose and inner peace?

What all of this confusion leads me to is this: being very careful about saying, "I'm blessed." Though I am continually grateful for what I have and enjoy in my life, I hate describing these joys as "blessings," lest I forget those without. Blessings come in many different forms, for sure, but it still irks me to hear any American say that they're "blessed." We're "blessed" by default of where we were born. That's not exactly a blessing from God. Or is it? I still can't totally believe that. God has always presented himself as a defender of the weak and the poor, so if riches and material goodies are your "blessings," I'd take another look at who Jesus cared for the most. I've got as many creature comforts as the next guy—I just don't want to call them "blessings." Why do some have their "daily bread," while others go to sleep hungry? Could it be a deeper problem—that within the world's resources, there is enough for everyone, but because of greed those resources aren't dispensed with grace and justice? I am a blessed person. But I'll only feel that way so long as I'm sharing those "blessings."

The Best Christmas Present

2009-12-23T08:55:00.003-05:00

At the risk of sounding utterly cliché, I wanted to write about my daughter's first Christmas and what a joy she is to my wife and me. Presents under the tree are always fun, especially because our family lives on a Dave Ramsey budget that doesn't usually allow for unnecessary extravagances each month. Christmas is when we stock up on entertainment and goodies for the year. We don't have cable, either, so a brand-new season of a favorite t.v. show is received with much gratitude. As fun as these presents are, my daughter, Lydia, is the best gift I could ever receive. To see her smile is a joy that stays with me throughout the day. To see her crawl and make new discoveries fills me with pleasure. Whether she's banging on a pot or pan, grabbing at a yet-to-be-opened Christmas gift, or chewing on a toy block, she's a wonder to behold.

Throughout the year, there are so many things that we can complain and squabble about. It's refreshing to look at a baby and be reminded of simplicity and grace. That's really what this season is about, right? A baby who came and changed everything, just like any new baby does to its parents. Nothing's the same anymore. Everything a parent does now revolves around that child and his or her schedule. A baby requires lots of love and attention. Some changes that a baby causes are hard: long, sleep-deprived nights, fussy mealtimes, constant attention and care. A baby is supposed to change our lives. Sometimes those changes are difficult to adjust to, but the reward is ultimately a lifetime of love. Whether a parent or not, it's nice to remember how a baby is supposed to pervade our life and change us from within.

Beautiful, Fleeting Moments

2009-11-14T14:29:00.008-05:00

My daughter, Lydia, is almost eight months old. What a ride it's been. For those who are parents, you'll relate well to what I'm writing. For those who aren't parents, maybe this will provide you some insight to what might lay ahead in your life. I'm discovering that with a child come many, many beautiful, fleeting moments — and they're all very special to behold.

Beautiful, fleeting moments — those moments that are a snapshot of a time in their first year — fly by so quickly that you have to document almost everything. That's why parents take a zillion photos of their baby. That's why every parent has a "baby book." That's probably why I'm writing this blog. These beautiful, little moments come and go so quickly and we want them to hang around a little while longer. For example, I remember not too long ago when my daughter could barely sit up, and I would place her on my chest as I lay on the bed. Fast-forward just a mere three to four weeks and she's on the brink of crawling. Now when she sits on my chest, she's moving all over the place, wanting to crawl right off of me. I miss the days when she sat contently on my chest. Where did those days run off to?

I look at pictures of my daughter from just two to three months ago. She hardly resembles the growing, animated little girl that I see every day. Just three months ago my wife and I couldn't have imagined getting through a single day without the help of Lydia's pacifiers. Now her own fingers do the trick quite nicely and the pacies have been retired to a drawer full of clothes that she's also quickly outgrowing. Right now Lydia babbles all day long and it's adorable. I know I'll miss those babbles in a few months when they slowly become words. One of the most special moments between my daughter and I has been when I'm able to place her in a baby carrier that straps over my shoulders. She's able to rest against my chest while still exploring the world around her. I use this carrier most often in the grocery store and have enjoyed carrying her this way for months. Sadly, Lydia is getting heavier by the week and I'm sensing the nearing cessation of this great baby-bonding accessory.

Each moment of her first year has been something very special. I've enjoyed seeing her grow from a tiny infant who hardly opened her eyes to a cute, little baby who wants to play all day long. It just never ceases to amaze me how quickly these little moments come and then how quickly they leave, only to make room for the next beautiful moment. Each of these stages are unique and so very precious, and though I love each new one, I can't help but miss the moment that just passed.

Sinful Saints

2009-10-26T10:52:00.021-04:00

There are a couple of good blogs that I follow. Only a couple, because the Internet is so full of voices, and those voices all start to sound like noise after a while. One good blog that I've recently discovered is called Sarcastic Lutheran: the cranky spirituality of a postmodern Gal. The blog's name is catchy enough in itself. However, the content is also really thoughtful and intriguing. It's written by a self-proclaimed "outlaw preacher," draped in tattoos and a love for God. She is the mission developer for House for All Sinners and Saints in Denver, Colorado. The name of the church is true enough, and this pastor seems to understand God's grace in a very down-to-earth, just-because-I-preach-doesn't-mean-I'm-perfect manner. To get a clearer picture of this church's heartbeat, check out the poster below.

Poster design by Jim Smelser

One of this "gal's" recent blogs caught my attention. It's called "A Confession." She writes:

I am uncomfortable with a whole lot of Christianity. But the thing is, I'm Christian (note I didn't say "a" Christian...as that, to me, plays into the whole Western individualism gone amuck in the church thing ....another example of which is the "personal" lord and savior bit...you know — "personal trainer", "personal shopper", "personal assistant" and "personal lord and savior")
Here's why I'm struggling with this right now. There is an emerging women's gathering in Portland that I'm considering attending. This is a huge step for me — to be willing to step outside my tribe a bit. So I poked around on the web looking for information about the event. I found a list of the organizers and looked at the home page from one of their churches. It looked amazing with lots of street kids and crazy dreadlocked pastors, but on their "about us" page the first thing was that "we believe the Bible is inerrant and totally true", which made me want to never stop slapping them.

What's odd is that I find myself nodding and smiling as I read this preacher's blog. Within a sentence or two, she summarizes what many postmodern Christians feel. We are a sinful bunch, trying to find the balance between logic, reason and faith. We believe in scientific evidence, yet are still drawn to God. We have seen lost hope and unanswered prayers, yet still pray to our Father in Heaven. We recognize our sin, yet continue to crawl back to the Lord. Why do we do this?

These are some of the hardest issues that Christians struggle with today. We believe in the Bible, but aren't sure that it's inerrant or infallible. Authoritative? Sure. Inspired? Definitely. We just aren't sure how to reconcile the contradictions and verses that don't seem to apply to our lives today. But you don't throw the baby out with the bath water. There's much to love and to gain in this Holy book. So we push forward, striving to learn more about this loving and confusing God that we serve.

The ironic and inspiring thing is, despite all the scientific evidence and convincing arguments against God that fill bookshelves and saturate Internet bandwidth, we sinful saints still press on, seeking God every day. This is amazing and profound to me. It gives me hope and energizes my spirit. You don't have to have all the answers to be Christian. You can have serious doubts and still be Christian. God's arms are open to all: the saints and especially the sinners. This is the astonishing message of grace.

All of this should come as a relief to many. We have a Father in Heaven who loves us completely. We can love him back...and also be mad at him. We can love him and be confused by his ways. Thankfully, in the end, this phrase holds true: There's nothing we can do to earn God's love — and there's nothing we can do to unearn it.

Click here to view the Outlaw Preacher's blog.

Facebook's Often-Overlooked Accountability Factor

2009-09-16T10:57:00.008-04:00

As I've recently been browsing the pages of my friends on Facebook, a particular theme has surfaced: Facebook, though unintentionally, promotes accountability.

I really don't believe this is intentional. Facebook, Myspace, Blogger, Twitter and other social networking sites promote individuality and creative expression, but accountability? C'mon. Facebook's the place where you can create an image for yourself. You can list music, quotes and books to define your personality. You can put your best face on, at least in the photographs you choose to post. Witty status updates? Post as many as you can think up. Facebook's like a high-school yearbook page that you can dress up any way you like.

So how does Facebook promote any type of accountability?

I've noticed that my pastor is on Facebook. So is my insurance agent. So are school teachers. And business owners. Even my mom is on Facebook. It's in their profiles that they've carefully edited what information and photos they post. And this makes sense. In a week's time you can have twenty new friends on Facebook. It can take over your life, really. I've seen people that update their Facebook status almost hourly. In this out-of-control, addictive environment (which I play along with), it can be easy to forget who your audience is. We have to be careful what we share online. I work in the field of ministry, so I better be careful as to what photos and information I post. The next time I run across a YouTube video of that profanity-laced Dr. Dre song that I liked in high school, I'll have to think twice before embedding it on my Facebook wall. And that's exactly how Facebook promotes accountability.

We love to share fun information and pictures with our family and friends through Facebook. Though in doing so, we also subconsciously make careful decisions as to what information and pictures we choose to share. We have to put on our best face, just in case our second-grade school teacher looks at our Facebook page. It's kind of fun to think about. We want to have a page that shows our true colors, but Facebook also causes us to examine those colors, just in case they're a little inappropriate. What an ironic quandary Facebook has become.

Still, this accountability issue is a good thing. We should always be aware of what we say and what things we're associated with. I'm just thinking we didn't expect Facebook to become a cyber-mom watching over us.

Erring On The Side Of Grace

2009-08-25T08:59:00.041-04:00

The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America's Annual Churchwide Assembly met in Minneapolis the week of August 17-23, 2009. One of the most stirring and controversial topics that was discussed and taken to vote was the ordination of gay and lesbian Christians.

During the week, the ELCA's voting members adopted, after much debate, proposals to direct changes in the ELCA's ministry policies, making it possible for people in publicly accountable, lifelong, monogamous, same-gender relationships to serve as ELCA associates in ministry, clergy, deaconesses and diaconal ministers.

While the language used is certainly a lot of hard-to-decipher church jargon, it's a huge decision that has the potential to split the Lutheran Church.

Of course the arguments for and against this change in policy are numerous. Some say it's clear that homosexuality is a sin, according to the Bible. Therefore, churches that ordain gays and lesbians are, in a sense, condoning sin. Others will say that the big picture of the Gospel is acceptance and respect for one another. Still others will point out that Jesus spoke out against divorce, yet churches allow divorced persons to serve as clergy.

As a Lutheran, I take an ironic stance on the subject. Bill Maher, in his recent documentary, Religulous, stated that he, when it came to belief in God, was on the side of, "I don't know." He found it very troubling that so many Christians hold a without-a-doubt certainty in regards to God and the afterlife. Though he's an atheist and I'm a Christian, I very much agree with his viewpoint. I believe in God, but I very much don't know where to place my feet on controversial religious issues.

And I'm perfectly okay with that.

We are all fooling ourselves if we believe that everyone we worship with on Sunday mornings has the same views as us. We all interpret Scripture differently and that's a good thing. That's the beauty of the Bible. In his epistles, Paul says multiple times to live in harmony with one another. We can worship side by side, regardless of our differing viewpoints.

Some will undoubtedly say that Scripture gives clear instructions on the type of person that can preside over a church. This is true, but is the apostle Paul's list exhaustive? After all, Paul writes that "the overseer must be...the husband of but one wife." Does this mean that single men (or women) are disqualified? There are many ways to examine the subject. At times I wonder if we take guidelines that Paul gave in the New Testament and turn them into inflexible laws. Jesus respected the law, but didn't want it to cause people to stumble and miss the point of God's love.

While some will choose to leave the Evangelical branch of the Lutheran Church, I hope that they will think further into the implication of such a decision. For instance, all believers identify themselves as "Christians." Still, all "Christians" will interpret the Bible differently and live out their life in ways that can contradict Christ's teachings. Do we then, therefore, break away from this group known as "Christians"? Of course not. We hold on. We stay the course. Just because some Lutherans believe in the ordination of homosexuals doesn't mean that all Lutherans have to agree to this. That's why the decision included a term called bound conscience. Reverend Dr. Timothy Wengert described bound conscience to the 2009 ELCA Assembly in this way:

"Respect for the bound conscience does not mean that one can simply declare one’s conscience to be bound to a particular interpretation of Scripture, and then make everybody else deal with it. Respecting bound conscience is not a form of selfishness or an excuse to sin. Instead, it means that the very people who hold different, opposing viewpoints on a particular moral issue based upon their understanding of Scripture, tradition and reason must recognize the bound conscience of the other, of their neighbor who disagrees with them, and then work in such ways as not to cause that other person to reject the faith and fellowship in Word and Sacrament."

Again, I don't know where I stand. My typical modus operandi in these situations is to err on the side of grace. We are all sinners, yet Christ died for us. We're all bastards, yet Christ loves us. This love is bigger than we can imagine. In trying to obey the Bible's teachings, we sometimes get entangled in the law and forget to simply love one another. Who is right and who is wrong? A better question might be, "am I showing love by my attitudes and actions or are my actions not showing love?"

We Want Spirituality, Just Not Too Much Of It

2009-08-11T22:16:00.004-04:00

I'm going to a rock concert this month with my brother. Creed has reunited and I'd kick myself if I miss them this time around. Creed has me thinking about spirituality and the role it plays in music. As with most of my blogs, I should give some background explanation.

As a band, Creed has always explored themes of spirituality in their music. They've been praised and criticized for this. They were sometimes labeled a Christian rock band due to the fact that all of their albums focus on questions of faith, Christianity and eternity(1). I find this curious and intriguing.

Did people love Creed because of their Christian leanings or simply because they were a great rock band? I'd like to think a little of both. Their singles that had the most success, Higher, My Sacrifice, What's This Life For, My Own Prison, With Arms Wide Open and One Last Breath all contain allusions to Christian theology. Is this a coincidence?

Here's where I'm going with all of this: Now that Creed has reunited, will their upcoming album, titled Full Circle, contain the same spiritual allusions that brought them previous success? More importantly, if this album doesn't contain any spiritual content, will it be as successful as the other albums?

People seem to be drawn to spirituality...just not too much of it. There's this invisible line in secular music where, if God and Jesus are mentioned too much, it doesn't fly. Yet musicians that ponder the supernatural and the spiritual tend to be commercially successful. I use Creed as the most prominent example. Alanis Morissette, Garth Brooks, Tupac Shakur and Natasha Bedingfield are other artists that come to mind.

So what does all of this mean? I'm not quite sure. It could mean that spiritual issues should be dealt in small doses if they're to have a substantial impact. Spirituality and theology are complex subjects. Too much tends to fall on deaf ears. Maybe I'm just looking way too deep into this topic. Still, it intrigues me and I can't wait to hear what Creed has to say on their upcoming release.

(1) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creed_(band)

Thumb-sucking Our Way To Contentment

2009-07-11T19:20:00.009-04:00

For some time now, I've found many compelling spiritual metaphors in the day-to-day stuff of life. Today one of these metaphors came in the form of thumb-sucking — finger-sucking, really. My little baby girl has discovered that her fingers can be used to pacify her need for milk. This has been amazing to see. My wife and I didn't teach her this tactic. She learned it all on her own and it fascinates me because it's one of her first real discoveries. It's also a bit ironic. You see, she really wants a bottle of milk, but ends up settling for her fingers, at least momentarily. What's really humorous is that she sometimes will prefer her fingers, even when the bottle is right at her mouth.

I guess we're all a little like that.

Just like my daughter has a deep need for her bottle of milk, we all have deeply-rooted needs — things like purpose, affection, community, and contentment. That's why it's so spiritually befitting to see my daughter choose her fingers over a bottle of milk. She really, really wants the milk, but has found a mediocre substitute in her fingers. Her impatience for the milk, whether it's being warmed up or right in front of her, parallels the impatience of most adults. We want fulfillment...and we want it now. If we'll just wait for the milk, God will provide. But we choose instead the mediocre substitutes of life — high-definition this and widescreen that. We find our contentment in the short-term highs, whether it's buying something we really don't need or finding our identity in our career. I fall victim to this pseudo-contentment just as much as the next guy. That's why it seemed so profound to watch as my daughter chose her fingers over the real deal. I believe that the truly meaningful stuff of life is found not in stores, but in the less-obvious places. It's sometimes hard to think of a good discussion with a friend or a walk with your spouse as a path toward contentment. Yet there it is. It's right at our fingertips and we go out and thumb-suck our way to contentment with something else. Poetic conviction has never been so clear.

Here's to choosing milk over our fingers.

The Temptation Of Atheism

2009-06-25T19:43:00.014-04:00

While I love research and statistics, most of my blogs are based more on my perceptions of the world. I read books that have done the statistical legwork and it usually just affirms what I suspected anyway. Once again, this blog is simply my perception of the world around me — how I see things. In a sense, it's truth to me. You may or may not find it truthful to you. That's the reality of life. All I have is my perception of truth. That's all any of us have, really.

My latest read has been, Letter To A Christian Nation, by Sam Harris. Harris, like Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, and Christopher Hitchens, is in a class that's been called The New Atheists. These gentlemen all wrote books, many on bestseller lists, that attack and denounce religion. Their arguments include asking thought-provoking questions such as why a loving God would kill children and why so much abuse and violence occurs due to religious beliefs. Sam Harris's book intrigued me. He made a great number of valid points and arguments against Christianity. Atheism has never looked so tempting.

It would be easy to be an atheist. Ah, to live in the land where logic reigns. To live in a place where what is seen is what is true. We could still have morals, but we wouldn't have to deal with all of those pesky Bible verses that contradict one another and are so utterly confusing. Sarcasm aside, I can only see two real cons against the whole proposition — accountability and motivation.

I work in the ministry field — some days for better, some for worse. Today was a better. I saw the validity in what I do. I saw another reason for belief in the unseen God that I follow. As a coworker and I were on our way to help a local resident with a chore, I felt a lack of motivation for the task. It was a busy day and I had more important things to do — at least I thought so. The resident we were to help is a widow and my coworker happened to point that out, in reference to Jesus's teaching about caring for the widows and the orphans. And like an uppercut to the jaw, the reality of her statement hit me. "Yeah, that is our job," I thought. Even as a Christian who works in the field of ministry, I was having trouble following the commands that I'm supposed to model.

Later this question arose: If I, as a Christian, struggle to do good things in this world, how would I ever do those good things as an atheist? I'm not suggesting that atheists are immoral people who don't care about helping others. I'm just stating that, without the accountability of my faith, I would have a hell of a hard time finding the motivation to help people in need.

At the end of the day, how do I come to terms with the enticing logic of atheism and the beautiful absurdity of faith? Some days the historical evidence and apologetics of Christianity prove to be enough. Some days I struggle as the logic and reason of atheism grabs at my will. In the end, it comes down to who I want to be. And, ultimately, faith is the helping hand I need toward that destination.

Missing The Point

2009-06-09T08:00:00.004-04:00

My mom always had an apt saying. She'd say, "Pick your battles." This mainly applied to my brother receiving a punishment much less harsh than I would have received for an identical misbehavior. But she was a tired mother and knew that some arguments just weren't worth picking. Better to have a peaceful household than one filled with anger and bitterness, even if it meant being a little lenient on the rules.

This principle shouldn't be lost on Christians. Sometimes we need to carefully "pick our battles." At times I wonder if we get so caught up in the rules that we miss the point of it all. In his book, Lord, Save Us From Your Followers, Dan Merchant said, "The thing that's particularly troubling to me is that when we engage with people we may not agree with, we seem to forget the essentials, love one another." Well put. And while most Christians are guilty of gravitating to Bible verses that fit our mindset, we can't deny the essentials. Be compassionate and humble. Live in harmony with one another. Be sympathetic. Don't judge each other. Love others deeply. These themes are repeated over and over again throughout Scripture. Many teachings in the Bible are a bit hazy and have multiple interpretations — these principles are clear.

We know the essentials; the hard part is living them out. It's sometimes easier to condemn than to show grace.

•••••••••••••••

So how do we have an open mind and an open heart while still standing firm in our beliefs?

I believe there is a balance. We can show love and acceptance to a person by simply acknowledging that we don't have all of the answers. Some issues are black-and-white and we feel very confident in our position. Others, however, aren't so clear and we need to embrace a humble spirit when discussing these issues with others. It's easy to argue someone down. However, is that really the right approach? Phillip Yancey once said, "No one ever converted to Christianity because they lost the argument." We must hold love for one another higher than anything else. That's what the Bible teaches and simply put: it just feels like the right thing to do. We can disagree on homosexuality, stem-cell research, church doctrine, politics, whatever. However, if these issues divide us, we've failed. We've missed the point. The point is to love, above all else. We should look to live in harmony with others, even when we don't see eye to eye. We really can agree to disagree. Or disagree to agree. However you view it, it's better than being divided.

One definition of reconciliation is to "win over to friendliness." That seems a worthwhile goal for Christians. We're not going to draw anybody to our side if the discussion becomes a debate. Civil and respectful dialogue can go a long way. When we find ourselves wanting to impose our viewpoint, let's remember that adults are stubborn. We're not likely to change anyone's mindset, anyway. Leave that up to the Holy Spirit.

The Mother That I Can Only Hope To Be

2009-05-16T04:23:00.017-04:00

It's 4:22 a.m. Yep, that's twenty-two minutes past four in the morning. Not long ago I only theoretically knew this time of day existed. I was never up this early to prove it. Yet as I sit here typing, my wife is one room away, feeding our new daughter. That simple act is the spark that triggered this blog. Let me start by saying that I'm a Christian. My wife is also a Christian. While I'm aware that term has many negative connotations surrounding it these days, to us being a Christian means living a life of service, loving people, and accepting God's grace when we fail at the first two. The interesting thing that I've found to be true is that my wife, now as a new mother, embodies Christ far better than I could ever hope to.

Let me provide a quick explanation.

My wife, being a new mother, has now inherited certain duties, whether she wants them or not. She is called to take care of our little girl no matter how she's feeling, what time of day it is, or what else is going on in her life. Our daughter's needs come first, period. The sacrifice that this requires is astounding to me. It's a job she excels at, much more than I do. In comparison to a mother, being a father is relatively easy. On any given night you might hear me say, "Honey, do you need me to get you a glass of water while you're feeding the baby? Okay, here you go. I'm going back to bed now." My problem is sleep, or the lack of it to be more specific. Sleep is one of our most fundamental needs. Without it, we aren't going to be productive for very long. In the middle of the night, when my wife and I have to get up to take care of our baby, I'm about as coherent as a zombie in a George Romero flick. My wife does a bit better. The truly inspiring thing is that she does it every night, without wavering. She pops out of bed and unhesitatingly meets our daughter's needs. She will be up with our little girl for an hour, sometimes longer, in the middle of the night. I'm only up a small portion of that time in a pitiful attempt to show my support.

This type of sacrifice and love for another human being is the true essence of being a follower of Christ. Moms everywhere embody it better than most men I've met. While this isn't meant to be a which-gender-is-better illustration or anything, my point is that when it comes to truly living a Christ-like example, mothers epitomize it.

I use the example of a mother caring for her child as an example because it truly exemplifies the type of selfless life Jesus calls us to. In the past, I've tried to live out my faith in a number of ways — mission trips, homeless ministries, soup kitchens, service at the church — but these things were all on my timetable. I chose when I would serve (and at which activity). While at times I was out of my comfort zone, I wasn't in the desert for forty days by any stretch. Mothers, though, have to constantly surrender themselves with a newborn. I see this most when my wife sits in her rocking chair at three in the morning, nursing our daughter. I can hardly stay awake, but she fights through to meet our daughter's needs. I am truly inspired by that.

To all the mothers out there who continually put their childrens' needs first, you're due much praise. As honored as I feel to be the father of a precious little girl, my wife is the one who deserves the glory. She serves not only as a model mother, but also a shining example of what a Christian should be.

The Missing Field Guide For Evangelism, Part 3

2009-04-29T16:25:00.033-04:00

A SATIRICAL LOOK AT HOW WE DO THIS THING CALLED "CHURCH"
On his Web site, BeyondRelevance.com, Richard Reising, a church marketing consultant, has posted a great video. It's had over 220,000 views on YouTube since November of 2008. The video is called "What If Starbucks Marketed Like A Church? A Parable." While it's satire at its best, it's also hard for Christians to watch because of its dead-on, albeit unappealing, representation of the church. Before you continue to read, take just a few minutes and watch.

DISSECTING THE VIDEO
For me, watching this video was like looking at myself in the mirror and hating how my hair looks. I know I can fix it, but it's going to take a lot of gel. One YouTube viewer even commented, "heres the reason why i HATE church lol." Hard words. Yet the church needs to hear them. The point of this video was to highlight the disconnect between how churches do things and the people they're trying to reach. I don't think this video is trying to purport that churches should be like a coffeehouse. It takes viewing the church in a different scenario to realize how unique our challenges are.

I have enjoyed breaking down this video and analyzing its purpose. In doing so, I have to admit that while many will watch it and agree that the church sometimes tries too hard in its efforts, many more will watch the video and call it foolish drivel. Therein lies the problem. Once again, we aren't all going to agree on the best ways to reach those outside the church. Though we're called not to conform to the patterns of this world*, we should attempt to "be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity*." (Rom. 12:4; Col. 4:5) Even this verse from Colossians could be interpreted several ways. Being "wise in the way you act toward outsiders" could mean that you Bible-thump them into a fearful acceptance of God's Word or it could also mean that you attempt to relate on their level, being aware of their church background (or lack of one). I'm gonna pick the latter.

Babies need milk, not food. This metaphor applies to young Christians and those outside the church, too. We cannot expect those without a thorough religious background to understand words and concepts like salvation, redemption, consecration, sanctification, and all the other "tions" that we like to use. My hope and prayer is that we all can keep this in mind as we move forward. Churches have much to offer the world. We have the love of God. We just need to move out of the way and let God show himself through us. Many times we think we have it all figured out. Well, the breaking news of the day is that we don't. Let's meet people where they are and just try to accept them there.

QUOTES TO CONSIDER
"No one ever converted to Christianity because they lost the argument." Phillip Yancey

"You can tell you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do." Anne Lamott

"If we're delivering a message that the people of America don't want to hear, so be it. As long as we're not delivering it in a way that they won't listen in the first place." Sen. Rick Santorum, Pennsylvania 1994-2006

"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it with religious conviction." Blaise Pascal

"As editor of the largest newspaper in West Virginia, I scan hundreds of reports daily and I am amazed by the frequency with which religion causes people to kill each other. It is a nearly universal pattern, undercutting the common assumption that religion makes people kind and tolerant." James Haught

"Beware you be not swallowed up in books! An ounce of love is worth a pound of knowledge." John Wesley

"If it weren't for Christians, I'd be a Christian." Mahatma Ghandi

"There's no greater role model in my view than Jesus Christ. It's just a shame that most of the people who follow him and call themselves Christians act nothing like him." Bill Maher

"Attack me, I do this myself, but attack me rather than the path I follow and which I point out to anyone who asks me where I think it lies. If I know the way home and am walking along it drunkenly, is it any less the right way because I am staggering from side to side!" Leo Tolstoy

"Stop judging others, and you will not be judged. For others will treat you as you treat them. Whatever measure you use in judging others, it will be used to measure how you are judged." Jesus

FINAL THOUGHTS
We've been tossed by the waves and are (almost) hopelessly stuck at sea. It's time to turn our boat around. I tend to believe that most people accept God because of his promises of forgiveness and grace, and that's the message we most need to convey. But again, that's just my opinion.

"...love your enemies...If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that." Jesus, Matt. 5:44,47

The Missing Field Guide For Evangelism, Part 2

2009-04-29T15:12:00.019-04:00

For the past 10 to 20 years, national church attendance has hovered around 40%. I'm not sure if that's a big deal or not. If Christians feel that what we do every Sunday is worth believing in, then it probably should be a big deal. What if a new poll reported that only 40% of Americans take baths? Pretty gross, right? We'd wince at that statistic because most people believe that bathing is necessary to good health. I guess with church-attendance statistics, we've grown a bit numb and many even take the 'to-each-his-own' perspective.

So church attendance isn't looking all that great. Now comes the obvious question: what can we do about it?

As a worker in the church, I have to consider statistics such as these. It makes my job hard, though. How am I supposed to help our local church grow when attendance is down all over the nation? As tempting as it might be, we can't simply stay with the attendance numbers that we're at. That's ignoring Jesus's mandate to "go and make disciples."

Are people not interested in spirituality anymore? No, people are still very interested in spirituality.

Are people distrusting of organized religion? Hmmm...

I believe that organized religion has a black cloud over its head. This cloud isn't going away anytime soon, either. Because of our disjointed methods of evangelism, we've represented our God in some negative ways over the years. There is no consistency. One church will say that homosexuals aren't welcome and another will allow homosexuals to preach from their pulpit. Who's right? Could they both be right somehow? One church allows women to preach, another doesn't. Again, who's right? The world watches us and shakes its head in confusion. Where did we go wrong?

There are plenty of books available that offer suggestions to break this negative evangelism cycle. No Perfect People Allowed: Creating a Come-As-You-Are Culture in the Church by John Burke, They Like Jesus But Not The Church by Dan Kimball, Lord, Save Us From Your Followers by Dan Merchant and UnChristian: What a New Generation Really Thinks About Christianity ... and Why It Matters by David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons are all great books addressing the negative stereotypes surrounding the church. But again, these books aren't 'Gospel.' They're just opinions and interpretations. Some will accept these evangelism methods, some won't. And we're back to square one.

Still, it's a topic important enough to discuss and seek out ways to break through the negative perceptions held against us by many outside the church.

I'll end this entry in the series with a quote from George Barna, whose company studies nationwide church participation. Mr. Barna addresses the challenges that Christians face in bringing the unchurched into our places of worship. He writes, "The numbers consistently point out that those who live without a regular face-to-face faith connection tend to be relatively isolated from the mainstream of society, tend to be non-committal in institutional and personal relationships, and typically revel in their independence. Attempting to get them involved in the life of a church is a real challenge. The best chance of getting them to a church is when someone they know and trust invites them, offers to accompany them, and there is reason to believe that the church event will address one of the issues or needs they are struggling with at that moment." As the church, we've got a challenge before us.

The Missing Field Guide For Evangelism, Part 1

2009-04-29T14:06:00.031-04:00

As I finished the book, They Like Jesus But Not The Church, by a pretty hip pastor named Dan Kimball, I realized I might have found the cause of a problem that's been occurring in the church for years. Let me start with the problem: we live in a post-Christian culture where there is a substantial dropout rate of younger people in churches and also a lack of people from emerging generations coming in. So now that we've identified the problem, why does it occur?

I believe this problem occurs because we have no field guide telling us how to share our beliefs. There's no bible instructing us how to teach the Bible. There's no official manual for evangelism. While there are plenty of books out there to help us with these things, who's methods are right? Everybody's got their own opinion and many have the validity of a chatroom posting. 'Just do what Jesus did' is a cop-out. We don't have the faith to move mountains or multiply bread and fish. Also, there are so many points in Scripture that 'good Christians' feel are necessary to bestow, finding an effective way to share one's faith has become much like a high-school science experiment.

Does it have to be this complicated?

Because most Christians have their own interpretation of what the Bible means when it says something controversial, we need to examine how to sludge past the divisive issues to show the heart of God. Dan Merchant is one guy who found a unique way to do this. In his book and documentary, Lord, Save Us From Your Followers -- Why Is The Gospel Of Love Dividing America?, the author and film-maker followed an idea birthed from Don Miller and Tony Kriz (of Blue Like Jazz fame). Dan set up a confessional booth at the Gay Pride Northwest festivities in Portland. Here's the catch – Dan was the one doing the confessing. After inviting a festival attendee to enter his booth, he would confess his mistakes as a Christian. Dan apologized for the way he and other Christians have treated homosexuals in the past. He tried to heal deep wounds between homosexuals and the church. Dan explained his motivation like this:

I desperately wanted to undo the perception of Christians and of God that many of the people I was about to meet undoubtedly would hold. I wanted to beg people to listen to me: "We've been showing it wrong. Don't judge Jesus on my lame-o example. You've heard that part of the Bible where Jesus said, 'he who is without sin cast the first stone'? I think that part is important."

Dan Merchant's words resonate deeply with me. My motivation for this blog series is summed up in the quote above. I desperately want people to know that Christians aren't all hypocrites who think they're better than everybody else. More importantly, I want people to know that Jesus wasn't like that, either.

This three-part blog series will attempt to further the ever-evolving discussion of evangelism in a post-Christian culture. This is not meant to simply be one man's opinion. It's meant to be a discussion. And like any good discussion, it will involve talking and listening.

Placebo Faith

2009-04-28T11:50:00.006-04:00

In my job I get to see and hear many examples of faith displayed in various ways. It has helped me to realize what true faith is. True faith is the kind you have when that's all that's left. You can have a college education or no education; you can be snooty rich or dirt poor; drive a Lexus or walk barefoot — true faith is measured by desperation. How desperate for God are you?

This topic has been on my mind as I hear stories that reflect true, sincere faith. When a spouse is ill or has an ongoing disability, and doctors aren't able to provide the answers that you would like, faith might be all you have left. This could be described as placebo faith. Faith that's simply a crutch. While faith in a higher power can surely be viewed that way, maybe it shouldn't be. If you've never been desperate, it's easy to look at Christian believers as uneducated fools who trust their God because they don't understand science and medicine. That may be true, but when science, medicine, logic, friends, and family cannot provide the help you're needing, that's where faith thrives. Without a broken spirit, it's unlikely that you'll understand true faith, faith that's definitely not a placebo.

If you are in a dire, desperate situation, you really can do only one of two things. You can pray or you can do nothing. When you pray from a desperate heart, you've found true faith. When you feel as if you can't fix this problem by yourself, you've found it. When you are so exhausted from fears and worries and you decide to hand the situation over to God, you've found it. This kind of faith allows you to see your situation differently. It changes your perspective. It heals you in ways you wouldn't expect.

True faith can't be placebo faith. That's not really faith, now is it?

The Power Of Advertising Vs. The Standards Of Religion

2009-04-08T15:20:00.044-04:00

Note: This blog was originally posted as Billboards Around Indy on May 29, 2007.

I've been doing a photo study on a series of new billboards around Indianapolis. A national church organization is advertising with messages such as, "Jesus said some are born gay," and, "Jesus affirmed a gay couple," all with Scripture to back up their claims.

Here are some of the billboard graphics:

The point of this blog is not to say whether I agree or disagree with their interpretation of Scripture. While admitting that this advertising campaign will offend many Christians, I want to make the point that, as a Christian, I'm not offended.

Thrown offguard? Sure.

Intrigued? Definitely.

Supportive? Yes.

I'm actually glad to see a billboard that challenges our common beliefs and engages our minds. Congratulations to this church. While most religious ads are predictable and sometimes cliché, this church causes drivers to do a doubletake and then want to grab their Bible to look up the advertised verses. Even their slogan, "Would Jesus Discriminate?," dares Christians to reexamine their perceptions of him.

The documentation on their Web site is very thought-provoking. They brought Bible verses that appear to support homosexuality to the front of my mind. Whether I agree or disagree, it certainly caused me to admit that there are differing viewpoints on the matter, and both sides can interpret Scripture to support their beliefs. One thing's for sure — Jesus would certainly welcome anyone with faith in him, regardless of their past or where they're coming from.

If anything, this campaign is advertising at its best. I work in advertising, so I pay attention to such things. The messages on these billboards (there's about 5 different ones), poke at the hearts of believers, intentionally or unintentionally. They anger some people and make some want to cheer. That's what advertising is supposed to do. It gets complex, though, when the topic advertised is a hot-button religious issue. Below is some evidence of the strong opposition generated from this campaign.

It's sad to see hate coming from people who are called to love their neighbors as themselves. The church's job is to extend open arms to everyone, regardless of their background. To this church, I again say congratulations. Though you may never read this blog, this believer has seen your message and applauds your efforts.

Thoughts On Free Will...

2009-04-08T15:15:00.004-04:00

This blog was originally posted June 4, 2007.

In an interview a few years ago, actor/comedian Tim Allen discussed his thoughts on free will. He basically said that it's hard to understand why God gives us free will as a gift, then punishes us when we don't choose him. Is that really free will? I find this point-of-view very interesting. Allen has a good point. Why would God give us free will, and then have certain expectations of what decisions we choose.

Then today as I was on a plane ride home to Indianapolis, I was reading a book called Flashbang by Mark Steele. Steele made a comparison between humans and a pet bird that he had owned as a child. His pet bird longed for freedom from its cage. Then the one time it got loose and out of the house, it came back. It had experienced freedom, then realized the comfortable protection of the cage was more appealing. Interesting. Steele went on to write that human beings, though longing for true freedom, also need that "cage," that comfortable protection. In short, we need parameters.

While I agree with Tim Allen's point-of-view, I also whole-heartedly agree with Mark Steele's.

So where does this leave me and my opinion?

I believe we can't handle total freedom responsibly. I believe God didn't want to create mindless robots, so we have the freedom to choose him or not. I still get confused in the details of free will, but that's okay. I'll never have it all figured out.

I'll close with a quote by a rapper who goes by the moniker Sintax the Terrific.
"Savior set himself at a distance to tease our nature / Not to overcome our will or frustrate our labor / But instead to set us free to chase his heart or flee his favor"

Eats With Sinners

2009-04-08T15:07:00.004-04:00

Note: This blog was originally posted July 21, 2007 on MySpace.

Committed to Christ, but walking the line
between the sacred and the secular.

This is where I'd like to be in my faith walk. This is where I try to be.

But should I even try to walk this line?

This week, I'd like to use a made-up term called an Everlast Christian. I recently rediscovered the song "What It's Like" by Everlast, former frontman of hip-hop group House of Pain. The song is a bluesy rap about life's harsh situations and how people can so easily point the finger of condemnation against their fellow man. While I'm not attempting to analyze Everlast's beliefs, I do admire his overall message and the way he transmits it to the public. He uses profanity and poetry to get his point across:
----------
"We've all seen the man at the liquor store beggin' for your change
The hair on his face is dirty, dreadlocked and full of mange
He asks the man for what he could spare with shame in his eyes
Get a job you f****n slob is all he replied
God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to sing the blues"
----------
The Everlast Christian knows that to relate to a person who isn't a Christian, he must speak to them where they are at. At times, he must break the stereotypes of what a Christian is in order to make a bold point. That may mean using profanity. That may mean taking a friend to a bar to talk over some beers. The Everlast Christian does what Jesus did — eats with sinners.

I find myself drawn to the characteristic of Jesus that ate with sinners. To me it says that I follow a Savior who met people where they were in their life and wasn't holier-than-thou when he was with them. He ate with them, spoke truth to them, and was a friend to them. While he did condemn people's actions at times, he loved more. It's funny; even in his condemnation of people's actions, he broke down Christian stereotypes. It's kind of weird to picture Jesus angrily flipping over tables at the temple, isn't it?

While I want to be totally committed to Christ, I don't want to ever think of myself as less of a sinner than anyone else. Sometimes my sins remind me that I'm human and need God just as much as the next guy. That doesn't justify sin, but I do like being reminded that I'm no better than anyone else.

So how do I place myself on the same level as everyone else, while continually trying to be a better person? How do I try to sin less, while still realizing that there's always sin in my life? These are my current thoughts and questions. I'm sure I don't have it figured out yet.

A Porn Debate?

2009-04-08T15:00:00.006-04:00

Note: This blog was originally posted August 11, 2007.

This past week I attended an unusual event. The title of this blog is probably the reason you're reading this, right? For a long time, I've been against pornography. It's not that I don't think a woman's body is beautiful. I'm just against objectifying women. With that said, there are 2 young pastors that share my feelings. They founded an anti-pornography Web site a couple of years ago, XXXchurch.com. These pastors aren't out to censor the porn industry. Nor are they against our freedom of speech. They just believe, as I do, that pornography is very addictive and can cause intimacy problems in relationships. Just as Alcoholics Anonymous is there for those struggling with alcohol abuse and nicotine patches are available for those attempting to quit smoking, XXXchurch.com is their ministry devoted to helping those who are wanting to give up pornography.

One of XXXchurch.com's founding partners is a pastor named Craig Gross. He is currently on the final leg of a 7-city tour with well-known porn star Ron Jeremy. The tour, called "The Great Porn Debate," is hitting some big cities in the mid-West and East coast. I went to their Indianapolis stop this past week and was extremely impressed with their debate. The concept was very intriguing to me: a pastor in a friendly debate with a porn star. What kind of crazy idea is that?! Let me ask a better question. What's the best approach to reaching your target audience: preaching against pornography in a church or hosting a debate with a porn star in big-city clubs and theatres? I think Craig's approach was a fantastic idea.

In this blog, I don't want to go into all the arguments made and statistics quoted. XXXchurch.com can do much of that. I would like to state some of my reactions and feelings about the event. First, I supported points made by both Ron Jeremy and Craig Gross. Ron Jeremy, a very well-educated man in his own right, defended the porn industry with many articles and well-documented statistics. Craig Gross defended his cause with many statistics and, maybe more importantly, testimonies from people negatively-affected by pornography. One great aspect to the debate was that Craig and Ron are friends. This wasn't an enraged, argumentative debate. This was 2 grown men having a grown-up, mild-tempered debate about the pornography industry and its effects on people. They are traveling on the same tour bus. They share some of the same ideas and beliefs. They just live different lifestyles.

In my opinion, this is the right way for Christians to make positive changes in the world. Show others love and try to understand others' viewpoints, even if you disagree with them. I wholeheartedly support what XXXchurch.com is doing. It is a light in a very, very dark part of our society. XXXchurch.com is addressing a very big problem for many—Christians, agnostics and atheists. It is an avenue of help and hope to those who feel trapped by an addiction to porn.

I'll close with a quote from the debate that has really stuck with me. Craig Gross said that Ron Jeremy and the porn industry welcomed him more than the church would probably welcome Ron Jeremy. I'd like to think that wasn't true, but in most cases, it probably is.

Hard Questions

2009-04-08T14:58:00.003-04:00

Note: This blog was origninally posted November 20, 2007 on MySpace.

In this week's blog, I'd like to take you on a quick journey. It's a journey that goes from the wide, open fields of doubt and skepticism to the narrow path of belief and acceptance. To start this journey, I'd like to share a thought that occurred to me yesterday. Why do Christians tend to acknowledge God's presence when something good occurs, but blame outside circumstances when something bad occurs? An example might be helpful here. Let's say that we pray for God to keep us safe as we drive during the upcoming holiday. If we were then to hear about an accident that occurred over the holidays on the news, we might tend to not blame God, but the conditions that surround the accident. "The driver must have been driving too fast." Do we believe that God protects some and doesn't protect others? Don't accidents occur even to those who pray for safe travels? We all make driving mistakes; what role does God's grace play? Another example might be cancer. When someone is diagnosed with cancer, most Christians wouldn't blame God for that person's cancer. However, when that same person survives their bout with the disease, most Christians would praise God for his hand of healing in the person's life. Does God cause cancer, or does he only heal it?

So why throw out a prayer for protection? Why believe that God is really looking out for us? These are the type of hard questions that people often ask. I don't have the answers to these questions. In thinking about these queries, I quietly ask myself why I believe in God when things aren't fair or logical in the world. I then remember the story of the widow who gave a couple copper coins, almost worthless, to the temple treasury. Jesus was impressed with her giving, not because of the amount that she gave, but because she gave everything she had to live on. Do you hear truth in that? What about the verse that tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves? The golden rule? Loving those who hate you? Because of the truth I hear in these verses, I want to believe in God. The hard questions are always going to be there. Sometimes they trip me and I fall in the open field of doubt. Then I'm reminded of the truth I've read in the Bible, and I stand up again to continue my journey on the narrow path.

It's easy to choose disbelief. There's plenty of messed-up crap in the world to make us question the presence of God. Do you ask hard questions? Do you want to find some truth in this life? Do you care? I serve a God who can handle all the questions I could ever throw at him. I may not find all of my answers, but that's not surprising. In the shadow of God, I'm about as large and intelligent as a grain of sand.

Thoughts On Urban Crime...

2009-04-08T14:53:00.006-04:00

Note: This blog was originally posted January 4, 2008 on MySpace.

It seems at least two to three mornings a week, as I watch the morning news, I hear a report about a shooting or a robbery. Thankfully, not all of these shootings are fatal. As the city has just ushered in a new mayor whose top priority in his new position is to fight crime, I have been thinking about my city's crime problem. You see, every evening as I leave work, I drive through many neighborhoods that could be categorized as rough or bad parts of town. I know what a bad neighborhood looks like: side streets with a few too many potholes, houses in disrepair, young men and women walking the streets late at night. There are areas of the city that just seem to stay drug-infested and crime-ridden. My brother-in-law and I have wondered from time to time, "How do you clean-up a bad area of a city?" Police certainly cannot patrol the streets every hour on the hour. Jails are over-crowded as it is. Guns are easy to buy. Parents are not always home to enforce the discipline that could prevent criminal leanings. Clearly, the problems outweigh the solutions.

So what are some solutions? Are there any? Stricter law enforcement? Curfews? Neighborhood watches? These things exist, yet crime continues strong.

Suggestions, Not Solutions
I do not have a solution. What I have is a suggestion—a suggestion that I would like to send to the city's new mayor. It seems all of us have ideas and some of them just might help social systems that need improvement. In my neighborhood, we have a homeowner's association. Many modern neighborhoods require the establishment of them. A homeowner's association's purpose is to keep a neighborhood a safe and respectable place to live. The thought is that safer neighborhoods equal a place where people want to live.

Could this idea be applied to older neighborhoods, neighborhoods that have a reputation for crime?

My suggestion is that cities require mandatory homeowner's association meetings, facilitated every month by a police officer. It would be irrational to suggest that residents be forced to attend these meetings. I do believe, if offered, residents would choose to attend. These meetings would allow residents to discuss problems in their neighborhoods, from crime to upkeep of sidewalks to speeding issues in residential areas. In turn, more residents are watching for crime and alerting one another and the police about suspicious activity. I recently heard an ad council radio spot featuring McGruff the Crime Dog. He said one of the easiest ways to prevent neighborhood crime is to get to know your neighbors. These meetings might create a sense of community among residents. Community, that is, a feeling of belonging, might weaken crime in a neighborhood. Safer neighborhoods would raise property values and attract new tenants, further weakening crime's hold on an area. Mandatory homeowner's associations would be no small task. It would require zoning and funding. More police officers on the streets also require more funding. Research always requires much funding, but if it's important to a society, it happens, sometimes regardless of the cost.

Would this idea curb the problem of crime? No. Would it weaken crime? It's worth a fighting chance.

Speaking Louder Than A Facebook Status

2009-03-13T22:08:00.014-04:00

Web logs. Facebook statuses. Twitter updates. Text messages. In today's world of super-connectivity and constant 'status' updates, it's easy to use these online forums as a platform for our opinions. This is both good and bad. Facebook, MySpace and other sites give us a means to influence our peers. But does this really do any good? Will this blog even penetrate the ingrained mindsets of its readers? Do these avenues of communication really make a difference?

Most of us are very hyper-connected, so much so that we barely have time to fully read a blog or lengthy email, much less let its words soak into our conscious. We are a very busy society. If anything has a chance to grab our attention, it has to be quick and catchy. So why do we spend so much of our time and energy notifying the world of our every thought and activity? Probably because it's a fun way to share community in this digital era.

If our opinions really matter, what's the best outlet for them? Is it Facebook? Writing a blog? A post on a Web site? We need to think beyond the boundaries of the Internet. Over half of human communication is nonverbal—and most of us know that actions speak louder than words.

In my free-time, I spend more than my fair share writing thoughts and opinions online. It's a great way to share my views. Yet it's also led me to this point, where I'm questioning the validity of those efforts. If we have something to say, and if it's truly important, then let's say it. Blogging is great, but don't let it be a substitute for action. If we have the time to write our Web logs and Facebook notes, then we should have the time to write a letter to our senators.

This all may sound as if I'm wary of technology and its influence in our lives. Not so. There are great opportunities for the truth to abound. Nowadays, the moment someone starts to report something false, there are twenty other people on the Internet within minutes setting the record straight. I am hesitant to believe, though, that the Internet and social networking sites are the most powerful ways to create the influence we seem to crave. I want to follow doers, not sayers. Inspirational words don't mean squat to me if there isn't action backing it up.

Can we change the world? I think so. But it'll take more than a Facebook status update.

Evil On My Mind

2009-03-11T15:35:00.007-04:00

Somehow evil has found a way to stick itself in my mind. Blame my recent reading material, I guess. I've been researching apologetics for a series of lessons that I'm teaching. Apologetics is defined as the defense of one's beliefs and this research has called my own into question. For the past decade, I've held a tight grip on my Christian faith. Sometimes I'm not quite sure why, either. Recently I've been reading so many articles and hearing so many stories that could cause me to question my faith. Evil has a way of doing that. It usually pushes people away from God. In fact, the problem of pain is the single biggest obstacle for spiritual seekers. Public-opinion pollster George Barna once conducted a survey that found the top question people would want to ask God was, "Why is there pain and suffering in the world?" In my opinion, these two issues are so closely related to evil that they could be brothers.

To be fair, pain and suffering can do us much good. Sometimes suffering produces in us endurance. Although, the pain I'm talking about is the undeserved and grossly unjust suffering that exists in this world.

I've been to India. I've been up close to those that end up in National Geographic pages. I've read the numbers over and over. 14 million orphaned by AIDS in Africa. 1.9 million street children in Mexico City (over 240,000 of those are abandoned). 1 in every 3 Afghan women experience physical, psychological or sexual violence. An estimated 2.4 million people worldwide are victims of human trafficking and forced prostitution. I don't even know how to fathom these statistics.

Most of the readers of this blog don't know how to fathom it, either. That's why we don't know how to help or where to start. I've learned throwing money at these problems is NOT the answer. When you give your money away, you are enabling a lifestyle where people expect handouts. It's like the old adage: Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for life. Charity removes the initiative for people to go and do for themselves.

So what's the answer and where am I going with all of this?

Well, there is no single or easy answer. Many factors contribute to the problem of suffering and evil in this world. Poverty, lack of education, corrupt government and a spiritual emptiness plague many parts of the world. These are some of the main causes of the evils we hear about in the news every day. Over half of world's population, which is 3 billion people, lives on less than two dollars a day. That's a statistic worth repeating: Over half of the world's population lives on less than two dollars a day. There is an extreme imbalance here. Can we fix this problem? Rick Warren, author of The Purpose-Driven Life and pastor of Saddleback Church, has suggested an initiative called The P.E.A.C.E. Plan, which enables churches worldwide to become a global distribution network, providing evangelism, education and health care. This makes sense because there are churches within walking distance almost anywhere in the world, whereas medical facilities are many times a one- to two-day walk. But what good is a plan like this if evil has ridden us of faith? Where is God, who's supposed to look out for "the least of these?" Should we just aim to be global do-gooders, without acknowledging a spiritual connection to it all?

These statistics and issues challenge faith, for sure. They're hope-killers, ripping to shreds any faith that we might have in a greater good. When I hear these statistics, I hear evil. When I read the stories of brothel girls, I read evil. When I see photos of dying children, I see evil. But for me, evil doesn't kill my faith. It actually acts as a spark. Evil, despite its best attempts, ignites my faith. You see, I believe that God is most needed where evil has set up its camp. If I accept that something is evil, it means that I acknowledge that there must be a moral 'good.' Ah, there's my spiritual connection. I choose to be on good's side and to fight injustice when and where I am able—and I am able. Most of us are. We must be honest, though—we cannot rid this world of evil. Still, that doesn't mean we should lay down and let it run all over us.

I will continue to read about evil, day after day, year after year. Somedays I will be numb to it, as many of us have become. It's hard not to numb our ears to its sound. Thankfully, God has used evil as an ignitor for my faith. Now I have to start doing something about it—something other than sending a check.

Tell Me Again, Why Do I Go To Church?

2009-03-11T15:32:00.002-04:00

It seems to me that we're a very skeptical society. This thought came to the front of my mind this week as I sat in a midweek Bible study at my church. We were discussing the popular book, The Shack, while relating its story of redemption to other facets of the Christian faith. One member of the group commented on a discussion he had with a missionary friend. This missionary friend told him that other cultures tend to see more miracles that we do in America. The missionary told him that the culture he's working in has seen almost every one of Jesus's miracles occur within the people there. They reported blind persons gaining vision, among other miracles.

Astonishing. Can you believe that? If you can't, then I'm glad you're reading this.

It's hard not to be skeptical. We're so used to our comfortable lives here that we probably lack the desperation for God and for healing that is prevalent in those who live in third-world countries. Most of us don't have many huge crises. If we get sick, we just take some medication. If we need food, we just go to the store and buy it. Now there still are instances in our country where we can find that desperation, such as in cases of a terminal illness, but for the most part, it's just not seen here.

So where does that leave us? And tell me again, why do I go to church?

I think we're all hungry for truth and for a purpose to our lives. I guess that's why we go to church. Do we think about that, though, as we sing songs and recite prayers on Sunday mornings? This is why many think religion has lost its relevance. Maybe they're right. We're just not very desperate for God. We've found fulfillment in other creature comforts and going to church tends to be more of a habitual thing, like brushing your teeth or going to the grocery store. My hope is that we can all start viewing church and our journey with God as something more like going to the gym. Just as with exercise, our journey with God is a slow, ongoing process that must be continually practiced in order to reap its rewards.

It's hard to see our need for faith when church seems so monotonous and repetitive. Although, we don't seem to mind repetitive actions when it comes to lifting weights and working out. That's because we know that exercise has to be ongoing and if we keep on the path, our bodies will show the results. It helps me to keep these types of things in mind as I go to church each week. I go to church not to be entertained, but as a life discipline. I need to be reminded that I need God. I need to receive forgiveness and I need to continually learn how to forgive. I hope we all get fed up with doing things our way and develop a hunger to do things differently. We need to be desperate for that.

The "Sinner's Prayer" And Other Tricks Of The Trade

2009-01-22T09:38:00.012-05:00

It seems that most of my blogs center on an issue that generally bothers me. It's not that I'm a negative person. Of course, I complain too much, just like the next guy. It's my hope that someone out in cyberspace will click on my Facebook page or on this Blogger page and happen to be inspired by one of my writings. That's mainly why I write. I hope to share some knowledge that I've gained in the hopes of breaking false mindsets. With that said, I'm going to write about the "sinner's prayer," as it's commonly referred to by many evangelicals.

There are words within the Christian community that I don't really connect with — evangelism, revival, righteous, fellowship, and, yes, sinner's prayer. I feel that these words have taken on a life of their own. They once meant something special, even holy, but have become entangled in negative stereotypes much like an old, abandoned house wrapped in ivy and overgrowth. It's much like the word 'adult.' The word adult has become so associated with pornography, i.e. 'adult bookstore,' that it holds little footing as to its true meaning. While sad, it's true and we must move on.

I was recently reading a booklet sent to our church. The booklet was about common marital dilemmas and how to gain a biblical view of marriage. It was a good booklet and I found much truth in its pages. Then I got to the last page. It was a page dedicated to God's love and how one can enter into a relationship with him. No problem yet. As I continued to read, though, I felt something that I've felt before — concerned. I read the part about praying the "sinner's prayer" and felt concerned that some might read this text and believe that a relationship with God hinges on praying specific words. This sinner's prayer outlined a sample prayer that one could say to accept God into their life. Also used was the often-quoted verse from Romans 10:9, "If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you will be saved." They actually capitalized the 'H' in him, a creative liberty not found in the Bible. While this verse is very true, using it solely ignores many other verses regarding salvation.

Let's take a quick look at a few of the other Bible verses that describe salvation. To be honest, I'm not sure that the word 'salvation' is even used in most of these verses. The first and most obvious is John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." I added the emphasis there to show that belief is the only requirement for eternal life — no words, no actions, just belief. There's also Mark 16:16, which tells some of Jesus's first words after his resurrection, "Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned." This time Jesus adds baptism as a means of salvation. There's John 14:6, in which Jesus describes himself as the way and the truth and the life. One of my favorites is a scene in the book of Acts, where, after a violent earthquake, a prison guard was about to stab himself because he thought his prisoners had escaped while under his watch. When he found Paul and Silas still sitting in their cell, he fell trembling before them, and asked what he must do to be saved. Paul and Silas replied, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved — you and your household." So it seems there isn't one exact formula for salvation. But these verses do show a common theme — belief.

Salvation is an astounding notion. It's especially amazing if it's understood properly. This is the foundation for this blog and my concern. I don't want anyone believing that salvation has to look a certain way. For some, a sinner's prayer is how they came to know God personally. That's great. But for many, many others, coming to faith is a slow, ugly, unsteady process in which we sluggishly let our guard down and finally believe that God is real. I think it's rarely an instantaneous event where your inhibitions suddenly fall away. Again, that does happen. But for most, even after they come to faith, doubts and fears tend to creep back in.

I would be hesitant to order a set of these aforementioned booklets. I just don't want people to feel that God requires more than their belief in him. A certain prayer or a deep understanding of salvation isn't needed here. God knows hearts and he's an expert in his field.

Here's an online column from Dare2Share Ministries founder Greg Stier on this topic:
http://www.christianpost.com/article/20101215/3-things-not-to-say-when-sharing-your-faith/

Passions

2008-12-06T08:58:00.005-05:00

This is intended to be a quick, on-the-run blog, as it's Saturday and there's errands to run and life to live (apart from this laptop). I feel motivated right now, though, to write briefly about passions. Being passionate about things in life is so important. I realized this as I was reading through a college friend's blogspot site. She is raising money to return to Africa, where she will teach and counsel others in the mission field. This, right now, is her life's work and her life's passion. Service. Selfless service. She is passionate and that passion speaks quite loud from her Web site. That made me think about my current passions. I'm passionate about my field of work, ministry, but it's not quite as black and white as that. That's very broad. I am finding myself passionate about so many things – using my graphic design skills for the Lord, leading classes that teach others how to handle money responsibly, coordinating a course that will help couples in their marriages, starting small groups that will deeply connect young adults at our church, helping those in our community who don't have enough. The list continues to grow. It's kind of weird. Some days I just go through the motions and kind of forget to look at the big picture. I forget why I do what I do. I'm passionate about justice, but what am I doing to seek justice for others? I'm not a doom-and-gloom person; there are many good things in this world and I try to focus on those things. But our economy is suffering and while I don't care if a CEO has to take a pay cut ('bout time), I do care about the guy that just lost his job and has to carry that weight on him as Christmas approaches. Let us find our passions and do something, anything, to live them out.

http://sendmeghantoafrica.blogspot.com

Religious Email Hell

2008-12-03T22:17:00.001-05:00

I love email. I'm just not a fan of forwarded emails. They're basically chain letters of the computer age. To be fair, forwards can be cute. I'm sure they honestly inspire some people. They just don't work that way for me. Most forwards are harmless notes that provide a brief break from work, making us smile and leaving us feeling a little better than before. Then there's the religious forwards. We've all seen them. Some have an inspiring personal story. Some, a message of hope. Others, a digital guilt-trip that belongs in the virtual trash bin. An example might be helpful, right? Okay. Here's a portion of the latest one I received:
If you love this man please forward to 10 people.
He did something for you, now do something for him.
Spread his word, and you'll be rewarded. How?
Matthew 10:32...'Whoever acknowledges Me before men, I will acknowledge him before My Father in heaven. But whoever disowns Me before men, I will disown him before My Father in heaven.'
Wow. I had almost forgotten how absurd these forwards had become. I say absurd because that's what they are. Period. They're just as ridiculous as the ones that claim Microsoft will donate two cents to the Make-A-Wish Foundation for every email that you forward. Yeah, right. Microsoft isn't a heartless company whose generosity depends on people's willingness to send forwarded emails. In the same way, Jesus Christ didn't die on a cross with an extra requirement that not only must we believe in him, we must also forward ten emails to prove it.

The problem is that people send these religious forwards out of guilt, not out of faith. Let's be real – these forwards do more harm than good and don't seem to serve a fruitful purpose. It's helpful to think about it in this way. Do you think a jaded person who's not a Christian will decide to come to faith because of a forwarded email? Maybe, but my guess is they'll find it very annoying. That forward will then probably reinforce a negative stereotype that already surrounds Christians. Here's a thought. Why not send a nice email to someone asking them how their day is going? That's a better example of doing something Christ-like than sending some cliché forward.

Forwarding an email is also a cop-out. Just as it's easier to share deep feelings using an instant message, it's easier to share your faith by sending a forward. That's not the way to share your faith. Sharing your faith is real when it's done in person, over a cup of coffee or while taking a walk with a friend. That's authentic faith. That's the type of faith that really does change lives. It's not always easy and is a lot harder than pressing "send" from your inbox. It's the type of faith, though, that truly gets others interested in your God. No email has that power.

I guess I'm going to hell because I deleted a religious forward. I just couldn't bring myself to send it on. It would only increase the gap that stands between authentic Christianity and damaging Christianity. As it is, that gap is too big and prevents far too many souls from crossing. I'm writing this blog because I don't want anyone else to send a religious forward out of guilt. It's wrong. The concept of 'earning' salvation by forwarding emails eerily resembles the days when Christians would buy penance from priests to have their sins forgiven. God's grace doesn't work like that. You don't get brownie points with God if you send the gospel over the World Wide Web. These religious emails use ignorant and damaging language like, "what goes around comes around," and, "if you love Jesus, you'll send this on." The people who write up these emails are using guilt like a gun. They load their magazine and fire a hundred rounds into cyberspace. Nowhere in the Bible does it mention a stipulation to God's grace. Belief alone saves a man. No one is going to hell because they delete a religious email without forwarding it to a dozen people. There is no ancient law regarding email forwards. It's not in the Bible. If I'm wrong, you can forward me an email with the chapter and verse.

(John 3:15, 16, and 17)

Scars Remain

2008-11-22T11:32:00.008-05:00

It was probably a month ago. A cold night and I was tired. My dog, Lucy, was outside in the backyard. I went outside on the deck to call her in for the night. Her usual reaction is to run up to me, ready to go inside the house. Every so often, though, she likes to do this thing my wife calls, "pussyfooting," in which she clearly sees me on the deck, calling her, yet chooses to take one or ten final sniffs before relinquishing to my summons. This was one of the "pussyfooting" nights. I was a bit agitated that she knew what she was supposed to do yet refused to do it. When this happens, I usually walk out in the yard, grab her by the collar and pull her along. As I walked up to her, Lucy, sensing that she was in trouble, started to run in circles and sideways to avoid the impending wrath of her daddy. I don't mean to sound like I'm abusive or even harsh with her. Lucy's a wonderful dog who we've trained in the 'Caesar Milan' style. We are strict, but not harsh. She ran to and fro, trying to avoid me. I finally grabbed a hold of her and brought her up on the deck. On this night I was a bit rough when I forced her on the deck. I was making her lie down so that she would know that she had misbehaved. In doing this, I hit my hand on one of the wood planks, cutting my left ring finger. Ouch. The last thing I needed along with irritation was pain and blood. And so began a lesson that I think God is trying to teach me.

As I said in the opening sentence of this blog, it's been around a month since that incident. My 'wound' is still visible and is healing at a painfully slow pace. I emphasize painfully because almost every day since cutting my finger I've found a way to hit it on something. It really, really hurts when I do that. It's a very physical reminder to me that I should have been more patient with Lucy that night. It's also a reminder that I will need to have extra patience in several months when I become a father for the first time. While I've come along way with patience since high school, I still somehow have a long way to go. Thank God for scars that keep reminding me of my stupidity and impatience. Most days, a quick, painful slap on the hand is probably just what I need. As I look down at my left ring finger, I smile. I'm sure I'll bump it on something today and immediately cringe. But then I'll smile again. I need those reminders. I'm too impatient to reflect on my stupidity otherwise.

The Bailout

2008-11-09T13:54:00.004-05:00

A Fictional Short Story

My story, though still in progress, starts about seven months ago. A college graduate two years removed and my life was going nowhere. You get the idea in college that the whole world is at your feet; that with this degree I'll be able to do anything. Unfortunately, I didn't plan on a dead-end job and a crap economy that prevented me from finding anything better. When you're in that type of situation, you start to look for fulfillment outside of work. My first couple of years at this job found me enjoying my new apartment, taking care of my own bills, and paying for a new car. It was an office job, nothing really special. My job was to take over-the-phone orders for mailing labels and business cards, design them, and send them on down the line for printing. I worked the noon-to-eight shift because our company, like so many others, wanted to provide their customers the convenience of "after-hours" service. Lucky me. Actually, I enjoyed the shift. I could sleep until nine-thirty or so in the morning, take my time getting ready, and stroll into work by noon. Once or twice a week I went out to eat by myself after work. For the first year or two, some of my coworkers would invite me to go out with them after work, but I wasn't into the bar scene. Plus, I really didn't have the money to spend anyway. As time rolled on, though, I felt my life needed something more.

It's funny how you become comfortably numb to your surroundings after a while. What was once exciting isn't special anymore. I was so glad to find my first job out of college and to be on my own. I craved the independence. Now that I had it, I kind of missed the company of my family. I ate dinner alone. I took walks alone. I went shopping alone. It makes sense to me, in hindsight, why I started spending more money and going out with coworkers after a couple years of doing life alone. Sometimes we would go to a bar and drink a few beers, complaining about the day and talking about the next "initiative" at work. Other times, if it was just the guys, we might go to a strip club for a couple of hours. Early on, I felt a sense that I should distance myself from these places as I would watch the morning news and hear of shootings or fights at bars and strip clubs. Since I had never experienced anything like that myself, I gradually talked myself into believing these activities were fine and that I didn't need to worry about it. It felt good to have something to look forward to at the end of the work week. When you live by yourself, something as trivial as grocery shopping becomes an excuse to wear your new jeans and get out for a bit. I had tired of looking forward to grocery shopping, though, and wanted a little more excitement—or at least something that felt more meaningful—outside of work. It became more and more common to find me at a bar with coworkers on Thursday night, at a strip club on Friday night, and alone on Saturday and Sunday nights. It occurred to me that my coworkers didn't really ever call me to get together on weekends. We only went out after work. Still, it was companionship and I desperately needed it.

The weeks rolled by, one by one, and I couldn't even see the rut that was being carved in my life. I was drinking more than I ever had in my life, even if it was only two to three nights a week. I never had really felt comfortable gawking at women, but every week, there I was, gawking at women and throwing my money at them. When we went to the bar on Thursday nights, my coworkers and I would get more of a chance to talk. The conversations were stupid and pointless, but it continued to feel good to have people around. I think deep down I knew I was lonely, but what could I do? I had my independence and I sure didn't want to move back to my parent's house. These thoughts consumed me on Saturday and Sunday nights. "I want something more in my life, but isn't that why I'm hanging out with my coworkers at the bars?" "If I'm lonely, isn't it better to be out with people than to be sitting on my couch at home?" I would rationalize it any way I could. That's why I continued to live the single, bar-hopping lifestyle. As the months progressed, I sometimes felt the sense that my life was out of order. When I started this job, I had plans to save a lot of money. I even had a budget laid out. I would get up early on Saturday mornings and jog around my apartment complex. There were even a couple of Sundays where I went to a local church. It felt like I had a good balance in my life. Unfortunately, it's hard for a single guy out of college to meet people. Most of my friends from college had married or didn't live close enough to hang out with regularly. I think that's what eventually drove me to take up the offers given by my coworkers. "Sure, I'll go to the bar tonight. What else am I doing?" That became a common response. As the rut indentation became deeper and deeper, I felt I was at a crossroads. I had the companionship I had longed for and I had weekly 'outings' to look forward to, but now I felt like it had become dull and meaningless. I guess I was either afraid or confused as to what to do about it. Afraid that if I tried to change my life, I'd end up where I started a couple of months before—alone. Confused as to what exactly I needed to do to get my life back on track. Too many of my evening consisted of mediocre American beer and deep-fried appetizers. All I had to show for my 'fun' times was clothes that smelled like a cigarette. This wasn't me. Yet I just kept rolling along. It was all I knew to do.

If I felt like I wasn't myself, that should indicate that I knew myself. Ironically, I didn't. As I tried to figure it out, I felt like I wasn't having much success. I didn't want this lifestyle anymore. I wanted a girlfriend. I wanted to take weekend hiking trips. I wanted to go to local football games. The thing that made me so mad was that all of these 'dreams' didn't really work if I was doing it by myself. So I resigned myself to renting sub-par movies and eating at one of three tables available at a small Chinese take-out restaurant a couple of blocks from my apartment. Sometimes I wanted to invite a coworker out to eat with me on the weekend, but then I thought more about it and decided to just go out by myself. I felt different than my coworkers. Don't get me wrong, they were nice and friendly overall, but I didn't feel like I quite fit in with them. They didn't seem to have any grand plans for their lives. They seemed content to just drift through the weeks and months, complaining about their jobs but exerting no energy into making a change. Sometimes I'd look at them and think, "Is this my future?" "Do I really want to be in this job in five years, spending my weeks complaining about insignificant problems at work?" It felt like I was waiting on something big to happen. When would a new job opportunity arise? When would I find a girlfriend? I needed something to complete my life. Something to provide greater meaning to this existence.

Growing up, I had never really been in trouble. There were a few detentions in high school, but that was about the extent of it. That's what makes the next part of this story so nonsensical. It had been about seven months since I had starting going to clubs with my coworkers. During this time, as I have mentioned, I was trying to figure out who I was and what I wanted out of life. It was at that point in which I found myself dumbfounded as I sat in a 20-foot-by-20-foot jail cell several weeks ago. I was out with my coworkers on a Friday night. We were at a sports bar and Jeff, one of my coworkers, turned his opinion up to an annoying volume. Jeff was kind of a jokester. He was the guy who didn't seem to mind if it was Monday morning at work—he'd be joking and smiling just the same. After drinking a little too much, Jeff began yelling at the television about a trade that the Cincinnati Reds had made that day. We all knew he was being a bit loud, but didn't say anything to him. Unfortunately, someone else did. A verbal testing of wills broke out, which led to a shove. A few punches were thrown, and I found myself trying to split up the fight. Out of nowhere came two bouncers who threw us all to the floor. I felt as low and dirty as the sticky floor I was lying on. Minutes later, I was in the back of a police car, being questioned about what had occurred. Since no one came to my side as a witness, it was up to me to defend my cause. "Officer, all I was doing was trying to split up the fight." "Well, the bouncers here said they saw all three of you getting into it," the officer replied. I knew arguing would get me nowhere, so I just sat in silence, trying to come to terms with this bizarre reality in front of me. The police drove us across town to the station and arrested us for public intoxication and disturbing the peace. We were each being held on a bond of fifteen-hundred dollars. I was worried. Not only did I not have fifteen-hundred dollars, but the last thing I wanted to do was to call my parents. Somehow I hoped this whole incident could just blow away. I wanted to get out of the situation and keep myself out of trouble for the rest of my life. But unless I made a call and admitted my mishap, I was stuck in that jail cell. Deep down I knew I shouldn't have been in that situation, but, again, I was lonely and craved the company of my coworkers. An hour or two had passed and all I could do was stare at the concrete blocks of the wall, wondering how I ended up in this place. I wasn't a bad person, was I? So why was I sitting in jail on a Friday night? Would this affect my employment? So many questions swirled through my mind. It was overwhelming and I hated myself for getting into this situation to begin with. It didn't matter that I didn't do anything wrong. Besides, they did have me honestly on one account—public intoxication. I had drunk more than my usual two beers on this night and knew I would have to stay at the bar until early in the morning for it to wear off. By this time, the lingering effects of that alcohol had worn off, but the guilt remained. "If I could just think of someone to call to get me out of here; I will pay them back and steer clear of bars for the rest of my days," I thought to myself. If this was some divine wake-up call for my life, it was coming through loud and clear.

Sitting in that cell, I had no desire to talk to my coworker Jeff. I was angry and bitter towards him for shooting his mouth off. Other nights when we would go out, his clamorousness had just slightly annoyed me. This time it infuriated me. I wondered why I even hung out with him. I guess it was simply because he was there. We didn't really have much in common, or even see eye-to-eye on most issues. The other guy that fought with Jeff sat in the corner with his head in his knees. I think he had drifted off to sleep. Jeff didn't really say anything, either. At first, he tried to defend himself, saying he'd done nothing wrong. I started to retaliate with my opinion, but quickly bit my tongue. It didn't matter at this point. After several hours and a thousand thoughts later, a police officer came back to our shared jail cell. "You guys might wanna listen up," the officer said. "I know it sounds odd, it certainly sounds that way to me. There's a gentleman out front who came in and offered to bail out you three, no questions asked. He says he'll be out in the office for about an hour. You have 'til then to take him up on his offer." The officer walked away and we all looked at one another in disbelief. "Is this for real?," I asked out loud. "Did someone call a relative or something?" Jeff then spoke up. "I didn't call anybody. That officer's yanking us. No one's gonna put up thousands of dollars to bail us out." We talked about it for a few minutes and called for the officer again. "Sir, who is this guy? How do we know this is legitimate?," I asked. The police officer said all that he knew was that a man was sitting out in his front office, claiming that he wanted to pay our bond. Jeff asked if we could talk to the man. The officer left again and when he came back, he said, "The gentleman agreed to walk back here, but says that there's nothing else to say about his offer. He says it's plain and simple." "Sir, we're just having a hard time believing that someone we don't know would offer to bail us out," I said. "How does he know us?" "He doesn't," the officer replied. "He indicated it was his business as to why he wanted to bail you out." We were skeptical yet curious at the same time. The officer returned with the gentleman. He was a tall, African-American man, probably in his 60s. He managed a half-smile at the three of us, then a quick nod as if to say, "believe it." He turned and walked back down the hall towards the front office. We sat there, not sure of what to make of this offer presented to us. "This guy's a whack," said the guy that fought with Jeff. "I'm not taking any bond money from some rich old 'brotha.' He can keep his black money." Jeff and I stared at one another, shocked at the guy's response. "It does sound too good to be true," Jeff replied. "This old man could use this as blackmail or who knows what else. I don't know that I want to be indebted to someone I don't even know. What if he follows us once we leave?" I sat there thinking about their responses. It did seem too good to be true. It seemed very strange and mysterious, too. Why was this man here? Was he watching us at the bar? It was almost like a storyline from a horror movie. There was, though, a calming sense of peace that I felt when I looked at the man. He seemed very humble, very sincere. Maybe he was just a nice old man who wanted to use his money to help out others. I wasn't sure, but I felt like I should accept his gift and walk away from this incident. I knew that I had made some mistakes, but I also knew I was ready to leave them there in that grungy jail cell. I wanted to turn my life around and maybe this was my chance to do that.

After about forty-five minutes, I had decided that I wanted to take the man up on his offer. It didn't make sense, but then again, neither did this whole night. The past seven months of my life hadn't made sense. I was ready for a new path. Calling for the officer, I told him that I wanted to accept the man's offer. He nodded and said he'd be back in a minute. Jeff shook his head at me. At this point, I didn't care what Jeff or anyone else thought of me. I didn't belong in this place anymore. It was too painfully reflective of how I felt inside—dirty, cracked, and broken. If this was for real, I was taking it. No looking back. The officer returned, informing the other two guys that their time to decide was up. He escorted me out of the cell and out to the front office. I looked around for the man to thank him. "Where'd he go?", I asked. "He paid your bond and left pretty quickly," the officer replied. "He was polite and didn't say much." It was only about three miles to my house, so I decided some fresh, early-morning air and a little time to think would do me good. I looked over my shoulders a few times, wondering if the man would be there. He wasn't. This was all sort of overwhelming to me. A random man, out of nowhere, offers to pay my bond. Why? Did he know me? All I knew for certain was that I was a free man and was given a second chance to get my life back on track. A weight had been removed from my shoulders. It felt good to have a fresh start. I had been shown grace and it felt as refreshing as the brisk morning air that rushed over my face. It was a new day and I now had a greater understanding of what a new day could be.

When It Comes To Politics, I Ain't Talkin'

2008-10-03T06:42:00.007-04:00

Sometime between my years in college and now, which is a span of about 7 years, I've become a news junkie of sorts. I get my daily fix by opening up the paper over a turkey sandwich during lunch. I turn to the Op-Ed pages and pour through different columns and reader opinions. A person learns and is able to develop their own opinion by listening to others. I guess that's why I read so many of these articles. I soak them in and let them marinate, all the while wanting to discuss my feelings on the latest newsworthy issue of the week. Lately these newsworthy issues have been centered on the Presidential campaigns. While I'd love to talk about what candidate I'm more supportive of and what issues concern me the most, I will not do that here. The point of this blog is to explain exactly why I won't be doing that here. More so than religion, I've discovered why you just can't talk about politics.

This has been somewhat hard for me because I love to talk. I love to discuss issues that are hot on American minds. I get a lot of enjoyment out of conversing about religion or social justice or energy independence or the local government. I don't have many new ideas on these subjects, just what I've heard and read in magazines and the newspaper. For some reason, though, politics draw such an ugly, black line that I choose to distance myself from it. People seem to be either hard right, hard left, or undecided. It's easy to be undecided because no single candidate has all the right answers for our country. Sometimes people will choose to support a candidate based on their position of one or two issues. I don't think that's healthy, either. Another situation that upsets me - when a person votes Republican or Democrat because their parents vote that way or because they've always considered themselves 'liberal' or 'conservative.' In fact, I will applaud anyone, no matter who they want to vote for, so long as they've researched and are educated on the candidate. We should vote based on a candidate's position on key issues, not because of the color of their party.

It's more important to be united as a country. Politics and party lines divide, but at least we live in a democracy. Along with that, it's important to avoid the subject of politics if it divides, which it usually does. Most minds aren't going to be swayed by my reasoning, so why fan the flames of contention? What's the point? It's better to find common ground with your fellow man than to be right simply for the sake of being right. What good is being right if you're the only one who believes you're right? Another way to look at it is this: we all have different opinions and no two people will agree on everything. To accept this and find a common ground is the key.

So the next time politics come up, mum's the word from me. If you're looking for a more in-depth opinion on key issues, I'll be the guy in the lunchroom with his head buried in the editorial pages and duct tape over his mouth.

My Wrestling Match With Financial Peace University (It Won)

2008-09-12T08:17:00.003-04:00

At the beginning of the year, my wife and I enrolled in a class at our church called, "Financial Peace University." If you're reading this blog, my guess is that you've heard of it. It was created by a man named Dave Ramsey. Just a quick background on the scenario of the class: it consisted of 13 sessions where we watched pre-recorded performances of Dave Ramsey teaching his course to a live audience. We would also follow along with a workbook, filling in the blanks as we went. There was some discussion after the video and then we would wrap up the session in prayer.

About 2 weeks into the course, I felt as if my soul was being challenged. Here I was in a church-sponsored class listening to a Christian financial guru teach his ideas, yet my soul felt the need to wrestle Dave Ramsey's teachings. You see, Dave Ramsey is a great financial expert but throughout the first few sessions of the course, it seemed to me that Mr. Ramsey's goal for himself and for all Financial Peace participants was to gain wealth. From my understanding of the Bible, the rich have a harder time finding themselves in heaven than do the poor. Of course, some will inherit wealth and some will find themselves wealthy through hard work, but, nonetheless, all of this talk of 'gaining wealth' made me a bit concerned. It was time to ask myself hard questions such as, "Should my goal in life be to gain wealth?," and, "Does God really want me to be rich?" So I prayed and I talked to my wife about my feelings. I decided to continue in the class and just hear the man out. I'm here to write about why I'm glad that I continued and completed "Financial Peace University."

Dave Ramsey uses plenty of scripture to support his case for being debt-free, saving money, and never using credit cards. It's a bit hard to swallow these types of ideas given the world we live in. It's to be expected that most people unfamiliar with Dave Ramsey's teachings will crinkle their noses and think to themselves, "Cut up my credit card? This guy is nuts." Although, when you hear personal stories of people who have to file bankruptcy and feel trapped by debt, you start to realize that money is more than digits that we transfer from computer to computer. Money and how we handle it is one of the most important things that we will work with in our lives. What kind of car we choose to drive - not terribly important. What kind of music we like - obviously not life-or-death. What restaurants we favor - not much of a big deal. How we handle money - huge.

I cannot stress my stance on this enough. Other than finding a personal connection to God, time spent with family, and working hard at whatever job we have, I believe that how we handle our finances is one of the most important things that we will ever have to deal with. Money affects everyone. No one is immune to it. No one is so rich that they can't lose it all. Dave Ramsey's class helped my wife and I to write out a budget, where every single dollar we earn is accounted for before a new month begins. Not one single dollar is left without a name. Four-hundred to groceries, ninety to restaurants, seventy to clothing and on down the line. Money unnamed is money put to waste. "Didn't I just have a twenty in my wallet three days ago?" Yeah, Scott, it went to Burger King two days ago, buying a book of stamps yesterday, and sodas from the vending machine throughout the week. "Oh yeah, I forgot."

When you live by a written budget, you gain a new-found freedom. Doesn't make sense, does it? How can confining your spending to a written plan bring freedom? Confinement - freedom. Doesn't add up. But in fact it does. When you know that you have enough money set aside within your checking account to pay for bills, groceries, clothing, restaurants, entertainment, and even some savings, then the extra amount that you're earning on every paycheck can be directed more efficiently. To paraphrase Dave Ramsey, you're telling your money what to do, rather than it telling you what to do. Money has a funny way of leaving our hands. As soon as I make it, much of it is already spent. My wife and I used to save, but not very regularly. The shame of it is that we had the money, we just didn't put much of it into a savings account. When you write out a budget and have to account for, or give a name to, every dollar that you make, you suddenly find money that you can put to savings. This was a revelation to me. "Wait a minute! I can pay all of my bills, buy groceries, eat out a couple of times, get an oil change, buy myself a CD and a new pair of shoes, give some money to the church, and still have money to put towards savings?" For many of us, the answer to that hypothetical question is YES. It might not be much money that can go to savings, but any amount into savings is better than sitting in a no-interest checking account, only waiting to be spent at a vending machine in the office.

To wrap up, I feel that following a written budget has reigned-in my spending habits. It's made me a better financial steward with the money God has entrusted to me. To put it in other words, I earn money and I'm called to spend it responsibly. Thanks to Dave Ramsey's class, I can now do that. Sure, I have always given money to church and to some charities. The difference is that now I'm prioritizing and I'm doing it on paper. I'm taking care of the necessities and paying off debts that I've accumulated first and then the extra that I have can be freely spent on buying a "just-because" gift for a friend or splurging on that new video game. There is no guilt and, more importantly, there is no debt. Responsible spending - what a great idea. I wrestled with Dave Ramsey's teachings but found that gaining wealth isn't the ultimate goal - being responsible with my money is. I pray more Americans will join in this type of thinking.

There are "Financial Peace University" classes forming all over America. A local bank in my town is even offering one. Check out www.DaveRamsey.com for more information. He's also on the Fox Business Network and has an excellent radio show. I encourage anyone who feels like their money is in control of them to find a class in your area and sign up. If you dedicate yourself to it, the class and its teachings will change your life for the better.

Please see www.daveramsey.com/fpu/home/ and enter your zip code for classes offered in your area.

More info: www.daveramsey.com, www.myspace.com/dave_ramsey, 1-888-22PEACE

Final Thoughts

2008-07-27T19:51:00.003-04:00

If I were a musician, I would end my album with a "Final Thoughts" track. It wouldn't be a song; it would probably be me on the mic, spouting off some quick thoughts to tickle the listener's brain. On that note, here are some text "Final Thoughts."

• Sometimes I wish people would take their poor attitude for a walk in the woods and let it get lost out there.

• As hard as I try not to sin, I will always fall short of God's glory.

• Complaining is fun, but it sure stinks to be on the receiving end of it.

• Our attitude is one of the most important choices we will ever make.

• Save up a lot of money over your lifetime and be willing to give it all away when you're old.

• Life is not easy and it's not fair, either. Accept it and move on.

• It's usually best to just keep your mouth shut. It'll keep you out of trouble with man and with God.

• Love other people. Accept other people. Don't judge other people.

• Though the above is easier said than done, we should all strive to that end.

• Smile at someone today.

• Work hard.

• Be friendly to people.

• Cell phones were a great idea – now they just seem to be a social crutch.

• Life is better with a soundtrack.

• I gave up cable TV and don't think I'm really missing much.

• I'm almost 30 years old – does that make me too old for MySpace?

• I don't have all the answers.

• Forget the "Lifeboat Theory"; We all have value in this world.

• Johnny Cash was the man.

• The Internet is one of the greatest inventions mankind has ever developed. It's too bad there's so much bad crap on it.

• Forgive others and allow yourself to be forgiven, too.

Let's keep this blog going; feel free to respond and add your "final thoughts."

Guided Like Oxen

2008-05-24T11:53:00.005-04:00

Not long ago, as I laid in bed before ending my day, I had a thought. I was reading a chapter of Psalms. The thought was a metaphor for the way in which God might "guide" us. As a Christian, I often hear people say things like, "I felt God guiding me" or "God led me to do this or that." I've always taken those statements with a touch of skepticism. I do believe that God "guides" us, but I guess I'm still trying to figure out exactly how he guides us. This metaphoric thought has stuck with me long enough that I thought I should write it down. And so I type.

Here was the thought: in my mind, I saw oxen in a field, pulling a plow. The path was laid out for them. They knew where to go. The oxen really didn't even need a farmer behind them. The path was clear and they knew to follow it. That thought led me to a recent memory. While on a mission trip to India last year, I saw oxen pulling sugar-cane wagons along the road. The amazing thing was that the drivers were typically lying atop the sugar cane, asleep at the wheel. The oxen knew to follow the paved road. Their path was clear. They didn't even need a driver to direct them from the fields to their final destination; they just knew to follow the road. It was pretty astonishing.

Could this be how God "guides" us?

Within our free will, are there "paths" in our lives that are clear and that we should follow? Does God lay out the path, leaving it up to us to take it or to go another way? Without a path, we could go any number of ways—left, right, north, south. When it's clear, much of the confusion is removed from life's mysterious path. I found comfort in those thoughts. When we pray and trust in this God, maybe he will guide us. To paraphrase Leo Tolstoy, we may walk drunkenly along the path sometimes, but that doesn't mean it's the wrong path.

My Art Museum Is A Panera Bread

2008-05-13T10:11:00.001-04:00

While I was in college, I studied fine art. I've always considered myself an artist. I am always seeing the world from an artistic set of eyes. In college, we were encouraged to visit as many art museums as possible. For art students in a small West Virginia town in the state's eastern panhandle, that meant that we should take full advantage of school bus trips to Baltimore or Washington, D.C. Though I enjoyed seeing museums in Baltimore, Washington, and even New York City, I must admit I wasn't truly inspired by the art I was taking in. Don't get me wrong. I appreciated classic paintings at the National Museum of Art and even some of the SoHo district's contemporary installations. It's just that I felt those particular pieces didn't reflect the type of artwork that I found appealing.

As time has passed since my days at Shepherd College, I have become aware of the art that motivates and inspires me. I have found this art in the designs of CD covers that I look at when I'm at Target or Borders. I've found this art on movie posters outside the Kerasotes theater. I find myself wanting to read certain books simply because the cover art is so engaging. This is the art that appeals to me.

This past week I found myself finding an art museum in an unusual place—a Panera Bread in Wheeling, West Virginia. My wife and I stopped at this Panera for a quick lunch on a long trip back to our home in Indiana. It was a new Panera store, and the large seating area and décor immediately reflected this when we entered. As I sat down with my food, I noticed some charcoal pencil drawings framed on the wall. They were rough sketches of a Panera bread-baker at work, kneading dough, icing scones, preparing desserts, and so forth. I thought the sketches' minimal use of detail provided a perfect amount of intimacy and beauty. After our meal, as were were walking around to refill our drinks, I saw a sepia-toned photo of a loaf of bread. It was shot in such a way as to highlight the detail of the bread in a very charming manner. I was impressed at how a photograph of bread could be so attractive. I then noticed a quilt hanging on the wall. It wasn't that it was a quilt so much as it was a rich display of autumn colors, each square of the quilt possessing its own portion of the season. As a graphic artist, I appreciated how those different colors complimented each other. As one single color, they are not very impressive, but to combine them shows their true beauty and significance.

As I think about it more, I realize that art museums sometimes intimidate me. There's a feeling that if I don't understand the work that I'm viewing, then maybe I'm not really an artist at heart. Shouldn't an artist enjoy art museums? Art, of course, is everywhere. I found my art museum at a Panera Bread. It took finding it at Panera for me to realize that art is always subjective. I relate to art that reflects my faith, my heart, and my passions and I will continue to enjoy finding it in the most unlikely places.

Thoughts On Happiness...

2008-04-21T20:18:00.001-04:00

This week I thought I'd write about happiness. The older I get, the more complicated life gets. It's hard sometimes to reconcile with the fact that life is rough and tiring. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed by it all.

Jobs. Bills. Family responsibilities. House maintenance. Lawn maintenance. Errands. Extracurricular involvement. I never seem to feel totally caught up.

Oh well, that's life. Right?

I think that life can get better as you get older, even if it gets more complex. I've found in my own life that I must prioritize and focus on what I have accomplished, rather than what I have yet to accomplish.

My wife and I do daily clutter-control. This allows us to not feel overwhelmed by chores at the end of the week. We go through our mail every day, quickly sending junk mail to its final resting place - the recycling basket. We take time to take walks and talk, which is very therapeutic for me. We make time to read and to watch a little television together.

Life is complex. The older you get, the harder it seems to be. But that's not the whole story. I always have something that I'm looking forward to, whether it's eating out at a new restaurant over the weekend or a mini-vacation next month. When I focus on what I've accomplished, I normally feel really good. I feel productive instead of lazy. It's important for us all to take time to reflect on goals met and hopes for the future. It's also my belief that some daily quiet time with God is a very healthy way to put one's life in the right perspective.

Good luck to everybody, 'cause we're all in this same boat called "life".

Advertising God

2008-03-26T20:36:00.007-04:00

Recently, on a drive to a friend's house, I passed a church with a large sign at its front entrance. This particular sign grabbed my attention more than most church signs do. I'm not sure if I'm more attentive to church signs because of my Christian faith or if non-churchgoers also scrutinize them like I do. Whatever the reason, this sign grabbed my attention and it said, "Hey, look at me. I'm up here in large capital letters and I have something to say."

Oh, it had something to say alright.

Short but surely not sweet, this church's sign read: "THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTERY."

Let me choose my words carefully and say that I wasn't supportive of this sign and its message for me and others passing by. If that church's goal is to welcome outsiders, their sign was a pretty poor invitation. I'll readily admit that our modern-day society seems to have a disparaging view of marriage. The divorce rate is higher now than it has ever been before. Many people have committed adultery with little guilt following afterward. With that said, are these people not welcome in church? Maybe what incited this church's signage was the recent news of now-former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer and his connection to a prostitution ring. Still, is Eliot Spitzer not welcome at the table of God's grace? If I had committed adultery, or was divorced, this church's sign would look like a big finger directing me to leave the premises. What I hope this church comes to realize is that there is a difference between accepting sinners into the house of God and condoning their sin.

I've written before about the importance of considering how we, as Christians, present ourselves to the world. My wife and I have discussed this topic at length, and we both are very passionate about representing Christ to the world in effective ways. Our words matter and the world doesn't need to know everything that we feel strongly about. When we share every opinion that we have, we begin to tread on the dangerous ground of negativity and intolerance. We must use much diligence as we choose our words and our actions. Others are watching.

Though it seems trivial, even a church sign needs to be handled with care. We are all sinners who need God's grace. Presenting yourself as a holy, faultless person really separates you into a different category from those you should be attempting to connect with. Christians are no better than those who aren't believers. In our attempts to share our faith with others, we must give considerable thought to ways that we can effectively show others who God is and how much he loves them. In a sense, we're advertising God to the world. Our society is jaded and very skeptical. If they think for a second that God is a heavy-handed judge just waiting to condemn them to death row, I suspect they'll turn away from him forever. I tend to believe that most people accept God because of his promises of forgiveness and grace, and that's the message we most need to convey.

I suppose it's God's will that I'm in advertising, because I'm naturally passionate about new methods of communicating a message to the public. I'm always thinking of more effective ways to 'advertise' faith. My wife said that if she were to decide what message was to go on a church sign, it would read, "ONLY SINNERS WELCOME HERE." Now that's a message that feels unexpectedly refreshing to me.

Greater Love Has No One Than This...

2008-03-09T17:12:00.008-04:00

As Easter approaches early this year, my wife and I have been practicing to perform “Carry My Cross” by rock band Third Day on Palm Sunday. As we were practicing with the church band, we all discussed showing some video clips on the altar screen as we perform the song. This brought me to a site called GodTube.com. It’s a Christian version of YouTube. I found several video montages of “Carry My Cross” overlayed with scenes from Mel Gibson’s “The Passion Of The Christ.” It’s been around three years since I’ve seen “The Passion” and I had forgotten how gut-wrenching a film it is. I was abruptly reminded of Christ’s sacrifice for mankind and what a horrific amount of pain he endured.

We call the Friday that marks his crucifixion ‘Good Friday.’ In light of the resurrection, I understand why we call it this. Although, after watching this video, I couldn’t help but think what a horrible Friday it was. Very few men have ever suffered in this way. His torture went on for twelve hours. He wasn’t guilty of any crime.

If you believe what the Bible says, that Jesus is the son of God and that he died for man’s sin, then this video will be very emotionally-draining for you. This video brought tears to my eyes. I guess that’s appropriate at Easter. Would anyone but God’s son willingly endure such punishment? Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13).

Let's Call A Duck A Duck (Free Speech)

2008-03-08T08:48:00.002-05:00

An offensive comment was recently posted on a local newspaper's blog by an employee of that paper. The comment, a racial slur, was posted by a man of color, interestingly enough. The newspaper made a public apology and dismissed the employee immediately. While I commend the newspaper for the apology, it caused me to question other areas of a newspaper. A racial slur is unacceptable because it is offensive and shows intolerance. I believe, then, that editorial cartoons also need to be examined because they display these same qualities. At the heart of my blog is this: why is it acceptable to mock our government leaders in an editorial cartoon, but unacceptable to use certain words against them in a column or online blog? Both forms of free speech can be offensive, especially to the person at which the cartoon or column is aimed. While I agree with the local newspaper's position, I do question the ethics behind their position.

Why Is One Form Of Criticism Acceptable In A Newspaper And Another Not?
While I'm not sure that I agree with what I'm about to say, I'd like to say it anyway. Some forms of criticism in a newspaper are acceptable while others are not because there are "no-no" words that should not be used in society. These words are off-limits because of how offensive they are. The employee that was dismissed by this local newspaper used a "no-no" word. He was dismissed, yet the newspaper still prints editorial cartoons that can also be viewed as offensive.

Let’s Call A Duck A Duck
Slander is slander. Mockery is mockery. Criticism is criticism. I don't agree with punishing one man for his form of criticism and allowing another's form of criticism to continue unscathed. It should be balanced and fair.

Do We Really Have ‘Freedom Of Speech’?
Free speech is a funny concept. In America, we have freedom of speech, but within the confines of the law. That in itself is an oxymoron: freedom, confinement. We are allowed to state our opinion publicly, but there can be consequences in doing so. I agree with this fact. If someone is threatening someone else publicly, that person should be held accountable and punished. Again, though, let's call a duck a duck. Maybe an asterisk is needed beside the phrase 'freedom of speech' in The Bill of Rights, noting that freedom of speech is not immune to the confines of the law.

Final Thoughts
In the instance of the local newspaper mentioned above, it seems to be a case of a person using a societal "no-no" word, thus putting pressure on the newspaper to apologize and dismiss the person guilty of using the word. This is unbalanced and unfair. Newspapers need to play a role in defining what words are healthy and acceptable forms of criticism and what words are not. If all public criticism can be offensive, then should it not all be under the same accountability?

Hard Questions

2008-03-08T08:43:00.002-05:00

In this blog, I'd like to take you on a quick journey. It's a journey that goes from the wide, open fields of doubt and skepticism to the narrow path of belief and acceptance. To start this journey, I'd like to share a thought that occurred to me yesterday. Why do Christians tend to acknowledge God's presence when something good occurs, but blame outside circumstances when something bad occurs? An example might be helpful here. Let's say that we pray for God to keep us safe as we drive during the upcoming holiday. If we were then to hear about an accident that occurred over the holidays on the news, we might tend to not blame God, but the conditions that surround the accident. "The driver must have been driving too fast." Do we believe that God protects some and doesn't protect others? Don't accidents occur even to those who pray for safe travels? We all make driving mistakes; what role does God's grace play? Another example might be cancer. When someone is diagnosed with cancer, most Christians wouldn't blame God for that person's cancer. However, when that same person survives their bout with the disease, most Christians would praise God for his hand of healing in the person's life. Does God cause cancer, or does he only heal it?

So why throw out a prayer for protection? Why believe that God is really looking out for us? These are the type of hard questions that people often ask. I don't have the answers to these questions. In thinking about these queries, I quietly ask myself why I believe in God when things aren't fair or logical in the world. Then I remember the story of the widow who gave a couple copper coins, almost worthless, to the temple treasury. Jesus was impressed with her giving, not because of the amount that she gave, but because she gave everything she had to live on. Do you hear truth in that? What about the verse that tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves? The golden rule? Loving those who hate you? Because of the truth I hear in these verses, I want to believe in God. The hard questions are always going to be there. Sometimes they trip me and I fall in the open field of doubt. Then I'm reminded of the truth I've read in the Bible, and I stand up again to continue my journey on the narrow path.

It's easy to choose disbelief. There's plenty of messed-up crap in the world to make us question the presence of God. Do you ask hard questions? Do you want to find some truth in this life? Do you care? I serve a God who can handle all the questions I could ever throw at him. I may not find all of my answers, but that's not surprising. In the shadow of God, I'm about as large and intelligent as a grain of sand.

Money To Burn On Evangelism (revisited)

2008-03-04T16:38:00.000-05:00

I-65 between Indianapolis and Nashville, Tennessee, is a rather boring stretch of highway. Don't get me wrong. The drive across the bridge into Louisville is very pretty and the scenery becomes more interesting the further south you go. For the most part, though, it's just highway. So when I drive south of Indy on I-65, I tend to give an eye to the billboards that line the road. It helps that I'm a graphic designer and love to look at advertising. On a recent trip to Nashville, I noticed one billboard in particular that grabbed my attention.

That it grabbed my attention at all is effective advertising. I tend to give most billboards only a passing glance. The problem is that the billboard fired me up, and not in a positive way. It read:
JESUS
SAVES
In an effort not to be a negative Christian, I should explain why a billboard with this message bothered me. Why would a billboard with a Christian message offend a Christian? This whole billboard was dedicated to a phrase that's as vague as a billboard that says 'FREE TIRES.' This hypothetical billboard doesn't tell where you can get these free tires. Are they new tires? Used tires? Is there a catch? You shake your head in distrust and keep driving.

Would anyone come to faith by simply reading the phrase 'Jesus Saves'?

In my opinion, this type of evangelism reduces the gospel message to a vague cliché. I'm sure the person who paid for the ad didn't mean for it to be received that way, especially by a Christian. As part of a younger generation of Christians, I want to be aware of how I'm received by others. I'm very careful about how I present my faith in conversations and elsewhere. I don't want to misrepresent Christ. I'm not perfect and do not pretend to be, but I strive to be honest and authentic.

If a person chooses to use a billboard as an evangelistic method, that's cool with me. It seems, though, that if an organization has enough money to buy advertising space on a highway billboard, a lot of careful thought should be put into the message that will be advertised. What words or images would really engage a passerby? What could be said that would prompt them to seriously evaluate their faith, or lack of faith?

Faith in God is really too big for a billboard. This doesn't mean that billboards or other types of advertising can't be effective forms of evangelism. In the example of the billboard, I might try a phrase such as:
Don't like religious people?
Neither did Jesus.
Luke 11:37-54
I'd like for people to think of Jesus outside of the stereotypes that we've boxed him into. I'd like to give people something to think about – brain food to chew on. A billboard advertisement can be a tool for evangelism. It can also be a tool against evangelism. It doesn't matter if a Christian or an atheist designs the billboard ad, the way the message is received is what's important. It seems too often that I see books, billboards, or preachers on television that have not carefully considered how their message will be received. Of course, the gospel message is always going to be accepted with hostility by many. And while that doesn't give us license to water-down the gospel, believers are taught to "be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity." (Col. 4:5)

This blog isn't meant to harshly criticize. I certainly don't want to condemn anyone who tries to promote the message of Christ. That doesn't mean that I will always agree with their methods.

What Pro-choice Is Not

2008-03-04T12:29:00.000-05:00

Until recently, I believed I was firmly pro-life. Don't worry, this blog won't get too political. Politics seem to have an agenda—I don't. My only goal is to engage readers' minds and share my point of view. In this blog, I'd like to expand on what I believe pro-choice is not.

Pro-choice is not pro-abortion. Pro-choice is not anti-life. Pro-choice is not unChristian. Pro-choice is not Democratic, nor is it anti-Republican. Pro-choice doesn't mean that you're evil. It doesn't mean you have a disregard for human life.

Right now some readers are agreeing with my writing and some are vehemently opposed. But remember, I began by saying that, until recently, I was firmly pro-life. To add a little more confusion, let me say that I still value life. I'm still anti-abortion. But let's take a quick look at what pro-choice means to me and why I believe America should take a pro-choice stance.

To put it metaphorically, Americans have opened Pandora's Box. Yes, we've opened the door to the act of abortion. It's too late to go back and try to 'uninvent' it or forget that it exists. With that said, I believe banning abortion in this country would have the same effect that prohibition had. If people want alcohol, they'll find ways to get alcohol. Certain drugs are illegal in America and yet their use is as rampant as ever. The difference with abortion is the potential effect it can have on two human lives—mother and child. The taking of one human life is horrible enough. If abortion is banned, many young, scared mothers-to-be will seek out abortion in unsafe and often very dangerous ways. I've heard this called "back-alley abortions." If abortion is banned, there is a greater potential for two human lives to be lost rather than just one.

So let's say pro-choice is the lesser of two evils.

I hope and pray that abortions will cease. But it's not likely when we live in a world such as ours. So with that, I believe that safe and legal procedures should be available for this choice, even if it's a choice I would never want a woman to make.